Well, the Oscars came and went. Not much to report actually with few surprises other than David Fincher losing best director and Jennifer Lawrence turning out to be the curviest woman in the room. Anyone who's seen her work in Winter's Bone will be stunned by her real appearance. The ceremony moved a little faster than usual, but was pretty lifeless. Hathaway gave it her all, although the big question today remains whether or not Franco was stoned through the telecast. Based on his robotic performance, it's a fair question. The King's Speech was the evening's big winner, a worthy choice in a year without an overwhelming favorite. But it's not the year's best film, as you're about to see (in reverse order).
Note: I saw virtually every notable film released this year excluding documentaries and foreign films (movies are supposed to be fun people), with the exception of Black Swan and Hereafter, which I'll get to eventually. The most amazing thing about the top ten . . . Half the list takes places in or around Boston! Hey, I can't help it if Hollywood finally realized we're the greatest city in the world.
10. True Grit - I considered a half-dozen films for the final spot, including Buried, The Green Zone, The Next Three Days, 127 Hours, Toy Story 3, & Winter's Bone, before settling reluctantly on the latest effort from the Coen Brothers (I would've felt better cutting the list at #7, but 10 is the unofficial required mark for lists like this). While not quite among their finest films, the year's most notable remake slowly drew me in and weeks later I find myself still thinking about it. If the plot was minimal, the visuals were anything but as the Coens produced images that will last long after they've gone. It's a western for sure, but like most of their work, it finds time to be moving, suspenseful, and funny. Newcomer Hailee Steinfeld (only 14!) stole most scenes from veterans Jeff Bridges & Matt Damon, who slid effortlessly into their respective roles. Though imperfect, any film with a major character named LaBoeuf (pronounced "La Beef") has to make my top 10, barely.
9. City Island - The closest thing to a comedy on the list, this little seen gem was a late addition to the top 10. Made for only 6 million dollars, it was one of the year's great surprises, as a small town family from the Bronx tries to conceal personal secrets from one another in hopes of maintaining their 'normal' lifestyle. The writing was delightfully quirky, the characters true individuals. But holding both the family and film together was Andy Garcia playing a corrections officer with closet acting aspirations and a convict son nobody knows about. For my money, it's the best performance in a vastly underrated career.
8. Shutter Island - Despite being one of the biggest movie stars in the world, Leonardo DiCaprio may actually be underrated. HIs haunting, paranoid work in Martin Scorsese's latest may be the most mature performance in a career destined for some type of lifetime achievement award years down the road. The movie opened last February to big business and mixed reviews, but on rewatch the film's debated ending adds resonance to every scene that came before. It's not the easiest film to watch (Scorsese's films are often visually uncompromising), but several individual scenes are among the most compelling of the year. The score and cinematography deserved oscar consideration, as did DiCaprio. Even if history regards this as another 'Cape Fear' from Scorsese, there are worse things to be. And kudos to Marty for choosing MA over NYC again!
7. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Pt. I - I'd liked all the previous Harry Potter films to varying degrees. This is the first one I've loved. Potential handicaps regarding the split of the lengthy final Potter novel were unfounded as Pt.I concluded dramatically, despite the fact that nearly all of the stories action is on hold for this summer's Pt. 2. Though 150 minutes, the film had me hooked from the opening snake scene (arguably the year's scariest). All three principal actors did their best work in by far the most adult film in the hugely successful series. I saw Pt. I alone in a completely empty movie theater long after it had opened and as I sat in my private auditorium on a Monday afternoon, I repeatedly felt I was watching an epic along the lines of Lord of the Rings. Something tells me they've saved the best for last.
6. Inception - Narrowly edges Potter as 2010's best blockbuster. Christopher Nolan continues to challenge his audiences with his latest mind-bender, focusing on a group of characters attempting to extract information from a target's dreams. A description of the plot doesn't do this film justice. Visually it's the most memorable film experience of the year, even if I'm not completely sold that every aspect of the story comes together. It demands careful audience attention and Nolan deserves credit for not lowering his standards. It boasts the year's best score, while DiCaprio proves the ideal anchor for the 2nd time in 2010, though he's supported by a strong ensemble including Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Marion Cotillard, & Ellen Page. The script was often ingenious, while those rotating city blocks may be the year's single greatest image. I hope that Nolan's second directing snub in three years (he also deserved one for The Dark Knight in '08) isn't the beginning of a trend. I trust the academy will eventually get it right.
5. The Ghost Writer - Sometimes all the elements fall into place and the result is a perfectly crafted motion picture. Roman Polanski's latest thriller is one such film, a mystery that keeps the audience off-balance and guessing until the very last frame. Of any 2010 release completely ignored by the academy, The Ghost Writer has the biggest beef. Few films this year evoked a stronger sense of time and place, or boasted a more intelligent script. The film was also perfectly cast, with Ewan McGregor, Pierce Brosnan, Olivia Williams, and especially Tom Wilkinson turning in fine performances. Every last detail seemed a deliberate choice, including a memorable musical score that matched the considerable atmosphere. Polanski, like Scorsese, is among a handful of directors who have a style that is unique to them and them alone. There's even a brief shot of that most familiar green Mass Pike sign reading Exit 17 Newton-Watertown. How good is that? But for some reason I don't have a strong desire to see it again. I appreciated knowing virtually nothing about the story going in, but because of this certain films are most effective with one viewing. Rewatchability is a major factor in establishing which movies stand the test of time and it's the reason that the #4 spot goes to another thriller, barely.
4. The Town - I have a hunch this one will rise in the rankings every 6 months or so. On my initial viewing of Ben Affleck's 2nd directorial feature (following 2007's near perfect Gone Baby Gone), I enjoyed it immensely while dismissing it as a fun heist movie. Another look revealed a deeper story and an establishment of location as character that surpassed The Departed in many ways. This is the 'most' Boston I've experienced at the movies in some time and while I don't claim to have grown up in Charlestown, everything just felt right. On the surface it's about the leader of a team of successful bank robbers who falls for the wrong woman. Underneath it's about survival and how there's really no right side of the law. Affleck is a good actor who for a time got stuck with lame star vehicles, but here he wisely surrounded himself with top talent, most notably Jeremy Renner whose performance as the volatile Jem was one of my 3 favorites from 2010. Strong turns were also given by Rebecca Hall, John Hamm, Chris Cooper, and the late Pete Postlethwaite. The Town will undoubtedly find it's way into my dvd collection if only for the action scenes, but it's better than that. As Fergie the Florist put it in that great, thick accent, "Taking down the cathedral of Boston? Priceless."
3. The King's Speech - I didn't want to see this movie. It looked like another stuffy, British period-piece with funny accents and few American actors. But overwhelmingly positive reviews and word of mouth forced my hand and I'm glad it did. While it'd be worth seeing if only for it's attention to setting detail, this film arguably had more heart than any other major release in 2010. Oscar winning director Tom Hooper turned a relatively simple story (a dehabilitating stammer forces King George VI to seek a speech therapist) into something truly compelling that builds momentum from a slightly slow start to it's perfectly handled climax. Interestingly enough, my top 3 movies are all based in large part on true stories. While not a reflection on the quality of these particular films, it certainly supports the notion that Hollywood no longer takes chances with original material. What distinguishes The King's Speech from the field are it's headlining performances. Colin Firth was sensational in his oscar winning title role, while Geoffrey Rush was every bit his equal as Lionel Logue. The two had remarkable chemistry in a film that was sad yet funny, tragic yet uplifting. Amongst recent best picture winners, it falls short of The Departed & No Country For Old Men, but easily surpasses Crash, Slumdog Millionaire, & The Hurt Locker. But it wouldn't have been my choice for the best of 2010.
2. The Fighter - The most entertaining film of 2010 also challenged The King's Speech for the year's best ensemble. The latest from quirky director David O. Russell stars Mark Wahlberg as Mickey Ward, a welterweight from Lowell (give it up for another film set in Massachusetts!) who struggles to become anything other than a stepping-stone for other boxers due to his dysfunctional family managed team. At the film's center is Mickey's relationship with older half-brother Dicky, his drug addicted trainer who simultaneously represents his greatest inspiration and obstacle. It's hard to make an original boxing movie, because the general plot-line has become such a cliche: An individual fights either underdog status (Rocky), personal demons (Raging Bull), or other various obstacles (Cinderella Man, The Hurricane, Million Dollar Baby) on his way to love & respect, if not a championship of some sort. But there's something inherently compelling about this structure that not only attracts audiences, but top talent due to the high-profile nature of these roles. Wahlberg is the film's rock in a strong performance, but it's Christian Bale (this year's best supporting actor) who walked off with the movie. It's the most convincing performance yet in a career filled with impressive transformations. I couldn't turn away any time Bale was onscreen. It was as if the filmmakers wandered into Lowell and cast a drifting crackhead! Also terrific were Amy Adams as Mickey's tough girlfriend (nominated) & another oscar winner, Melissa Leo as Mickey's mother and manager. The fighting scenes were believable and filmed with flair, but these relationships outside the ring were what made this more than just another boxing movie.
1. The Social Network - A close call for the top spot, but David Fincher's latest gets the nod (sorry T) for it's undeniable bond to the 21st century. No film in recent years felt as much a product of it's time as this one. I'd imagine it's how audiences connected with The Graduate & Easy Rider in the late 60s, or The Breakfast Club & Wall Street in the mid-80s. It tapped into something very real and very modern about the way we interact and a society that lives online (even grandparents use facebook). Of course all of this would be irrelevant if the film weren't so well made. The script sparkles with creative dialogue (from oscar winner Aaron Sorkin) as it chronicles the invention of facebook by Mark Zuckerberg and subsequent lawsuits over ownership rights to what has since become the world's most popular website. Early scenes at Harvard provide a perfect snapshot of college life (for many I'm sure) in the last decade, while introducing vividly realized characters. As Zuckerberg, Jesse Eisenberg cements his status as one of the best young actors working. His rapid fire delivery and lack of understanding in human relationships makes him an easy target for others contempt once he hits the jackpot. Nearly his equal was Andrew Garfield as facebook cofounder and Zuckerberg's former best friend Eduardo Saverin, who (according to the movie) was more-or-less tricked out of his company shares. Justin Timberlake was also noteworthy as Napster creator Sean Parker, who's role in the rise of facebook was news to many viewers (myself included). Fincher made the movie fascinating from one end to the other. It's a two hour movie that feels about 1/2 that length. I liked it even more on 2nd viewing and suspect it's the film that will stand the test of time.
Before mentioning the year's worst films, it's worth mentioning a few of 2010's GUILTY PLEASURES, defined as "Something that brings pleasure but is considered taboo, unadvisable or lowbrow." The definition isn't full proof (a few of these are pretty decent movies) but for the most part, these are movies I greatly enjoyed despite being unable to defend on any sort of intellectual level. Perhaps unsurprisingly given the category title, a distinct 80s feel permeates the group.
The A-Team - My favorite of the big, loud, dumb, summer offerings (besting The Expendables in the battle of testosterone-fueled 80s mayhem), the umpteenth remake of a famous TV show was pure adrenaline. They cast all 4 leads exceptionally well (Liam Neeson, Bradley Cooper, 'Rampage' Jackson, & Sharlto Copley) and kept the Lethal Weaponish banter rolling throughout. The action was suitably over-the-top, although it lost a little momentum by the end. Copley's failed attempt to jump start an ambulance with a defribillator was a highlight.
Diary of a Wimpy Kid - No 2010 release brought so many unexpected smiles to my face. Junior High is an often neglected era in people's lives (there have been 100s of High School movies) and the film version of the children's book got much of it just right. I remembered all the silly insults, the awkwardness of puberty, our views on adults & siblings, and those last years of male bonding before girls became something more than that other weird species in class. This one struck a chord.
The Karate Kid - Although A.J. will consider this blasphemy, I wandered into the remake of one of my favorite 80s movies about a month after it opened and found myself enjoying it almost as much as the original. The main cast was younger, but they made it work. Jackie Chan replaced Pat Morita, but he made it work (he may have actually been better). It was at least 20 minutes too long, but it was sweet, funny, & well acted with a satisfying ending, though the climax fell FAR short of the original.
Predators - Who would've thought Adrien Brody could so capably replace Arnold Schwarzenegger? He held the movie together with tough-talking charisma, as those around him were gruesomely picked off one-by-one. Although Lawrence Fishburne turned up briefly (in a segment that made little sense), the remake did a reasonably faithful job replicating the somehow claustrophobic jungle-like-setting of the original. The headlining villain remains one of the last truly inspired visual creations in the movies.
She's Out of My League - That romantic-comedy with the nasal voiced Jay Baruchel? Really? Baruchel often inspires eye-rolling when I see his name, but he has a strange charm that manages to win over the viewer by the end. The movie was less raunchy than one might expect from the ads, but it suckered me in with our hero constantly at odds with his own self-esteem as he struggled to date the stunning Alice Eve (only in a movie could this happen). Put it this way . . . It wouldn't have been worth paying to see, but it's a nice little comedy on a rainy night on DVD.
A few more movies I can recommend without reservation, depending on your mood:
For the action/thriller crowd:
From Paris with Love (Travolta's best role in years)
Frozen (several genuinely frightening moments)
Iron Man 2 (a worthy sequel that plays better at home)
Kick-Ass (Cage's best paycheck role in a decade)
Unstoppable (a genuine adrenaline-rush, could've been the sequel to Speed)
For the adults in the room:
Conviction (another Mass-based story w/ a great performance by Sam Rockwell)
The Kids Are All Right (well-acted & written, but wildly overpraised)
Love and Other Drugs (successfully took a young adult relationship seriously)
Morning Glory (slight, but fun look at a TV newsroom w/ a strong cast)
Solitary Man (an inspired Michael Douglas performance, far better than his mediocre Wall Street sequel)
For the kids in the room:
Alice in Wonderland (Tim Burton's most entertaining, creative film in years)
How to Train Your Dragon (a lot of fun for all ages)
Shrek Forever After (better than the previous two sequels)
Sadly, I couldn't put together a legitimate comedy list. An abundance of high-profile studio comedies came out in 2010, but it seemed the bigger the stars, the greater reliance on their appeal for laughs. There was nothing to approach the laugh ratio of movies like Superbad ('07) or even The Hangover ('09). Instead we got new entries from Sandler (Grown Ups), Ferrell (The Other Guys), Carell (Dinner for Schmucks/Date Night), Cusack (another 80s throwback Hot Tub Time Machine), Stiller (Little Fockers), Rock (Death at a Funeral), & Downey Jr. (Due Date). All were sort of amusing in spurts, but ultimately forgettable. Of all this year's major comedy releases, the most consistently funny was probably Get Him to the Greek. Too bad.
And finally we've arrived at the year's worst. I had to choose only 5 from the remaining 25 or so films I haven't mentioned, no easy task. Many were merely mediocre and will escape my wrath. But there's no excusing the next group, all of which I genuinely hated (thankfully I didn't pay to see any of them) . . .
5. Cop Out - Narrowly edged The Bounty Hunter (which I turned off before finishing) & Prince of Persia (which I should've) for the final spot. I've always liked Bruce Willis in spite of his inconsistent (to be kind) career choices and this lame action/comedy was one of the worst. Tracy Morgan, who can be funny in small doses, is annoying to a fault here in a movie that has no identity. Is it a standard order police thriller or is it trying to lampoon the genre? Most disheartening is that it's terribly directed by Kevin Smith, who no doubt could've mustered a few laughs had he written it himself. This is the worst kind of mainstream entertainment, a movie that attempts little and can't even succeed at that. A complete bore.
4. Valentine's Day - Makes the previous year's He's Just Not That Into You look like an oscar contender. For a while Valentine's Day got by on the sheer volume of popular actors they'd assembled. But it quickly became clear that the studio behind this disaster had no intention beyond drawing a holiday crowd opening weekend, which they sadly achieved. There is no real story at all, just a collection of uninspired vignettes highlighting the small problems that arise every February 14th. And in an attempt to accommodate so many stars, this lifeless mess of a romantic-comedy clocks in at more than 2 hours! Forget Valentine's Day: this should be played at every Passover Seder so we never forget the pain of our ancestors.
3. Robin Hood - The worst film ever directed by Ridley Scott, and it's not even close. I wanted to see the latest version of Robin Hood in theaters but stayed away on the advice of most critics and I'm glad I did. Sitting through this nonsensical, ugly 150 minute movie was a monumental waste of time. There wasn't a single exciting scene, it was poorly paced, with no character development. The latter was unacceptable given they cast two of the finest actors in the business (Russell Crowe & Cate Blanchett) in the leads. Neither brought anything special to their roles and I'm starting to think Gladiator (2000) is the worst thing that could've happened to Scott's career. It seems ever since he's been trying replicate the success of the blockbuster best picture winner (the similarly themed Kingdom of Heaven was also a dud) when his greatest strength has always been quieter films based on atmosphere and character. You'd be better off revisiting the Costner version, which is saying something.
2. Eat Pray Love - I'm not sure I've ever hated a lead character in any movie more than Liz Gilbert, the subject of 2010's most insufferable chick flick. Reportedly people either love or hate the book upon which it's based, detailing Gilbert's year long personal exploration in Rome, India, & Bali. Not only was the story among the most self-indulgent I've ever witnessed onscreen, but I found Gilbert herself completely unredeeming. She came off as selfish and boring and nothing about this woman warranted a big screen treatment. It's worth noting there's nothing wrong with the performances. Julia Roberts was actually quite good in the lead and was given strong support by the likes of Richard Jenkins and Javier Bardem, the latter one of many men she couldn't muster up the nerve to give anything that didn't first benefit herself. It's hard to like a film in which you want to choke the main character every time she appears onscreen, which was pretty much every scene. Not only that, but this slight tale dragged on FOREVER! Even T left the room with about 30 minutes remaining. Take this review with a grain of salt. Obviously I was not the target audience for this trash heap, but I'd like to believe I could identify a thoughtful take on an adult woman having a midlife crisis. This wasn't it.
1. The Last Airbender - A close call over Eat Pray Love, but at least one could argue that film was assembled with at a vague degree of competence. The latest from M. Night Shyamalan is the worst film yet on a resume that now includes The Village, Lady in the Water, and The Happening. No small feat there! What's most disheartening is it was only a decade ago many thought Shyamalan was the most talented writer/director to emerge in years, a fearless cross between Spielberg and Hitchcock. Some have claimed the mega-success of The Sixth Sense ('99), with it's shocking twist ending ruined the director with audience expectations that couldn't possibly be met. But that's bullshit. Even if the endings to follow ups like Unbreakable and Signs fell short of his signature, they were none-the-less well told stories with attention to craft and detail. 2010 Shyamalan is much closer to Michael Bay than the aforementioned directors. Airbender is so stupid, so dull, so completely devoid of any thought, it's as if someone bet Shyamalan that he couldn't ruin his career in a 5 year span. The story is not for anyone above the age of 10. The special f/x are hokey. The only notable name in the cast is Dev Patel, a far cry from the days when Willis & Crazy Mel were headlining his pictures. The rest is comprised of no names acting like they are in a bad 3rd grade stage play. I considered turning this movie off a half-dozen times, but I stubbornly have a rule that I need to finish movies I've started. I wish I didn't. If I followed my gut and stopped watching fifteen minutes in, I could've spent that afternoon doing laundry, cutting my toe nails, emptying the dishwasher, shaving, and job hunting. For the record those are 5 of my least favorite activities on Earth. And all would've been preferable to experiencing The Last Airbender.
EDIT: 11/02/11
How Do You Know, featuring Reese Witherspoon, Paul Rudd, Owen Wilson, & Jack Nicholson is one of the worst romantic comedies in a decade. Unoriginal, unfunny, and completely boring. It would probably take the #3 spot on my worst list if I'd seen it earlier.
Thanks for reading
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Sunday, February 27, 2011
Friday, February 25, 2011
Oscars 2011 & the Trouble with Procrastination
I'm finding it increasingly difficult to care about the Oscars. I've watched the annual telecast every year I can remember, dating back to watching with my Mom was a kid. We've always loved movies and this is unlikely to change. But while I will undoubtedly tune in again this Sunday night, I have mixed expectations. So many awards seem predetermined as to rob any potential suspense. Colin Firth is a lock for best actor (deservedly for his work in The King's Speech), while Christian Bale is a good bet for supporting actor for The Fighter (in the best performance of 2010). Toy Story 3 locked up best animated feature back in July, while the screenplay awards will go to The Social Network (adapted) and The King's Speech (original), unless the wildly inventive Inception pulls off an upset. The King's Speech will likely take best picture, but may lose director to Network's David Fincher. So what's left? The actress awards are less certain. Best actress will probably go to Natalie Portman (Black Swan) over Annette Bening (The Kids Are All Right), but why wasn't her castmate Julianne Moore nominated again? Supporting Actress is the only wide open category, but I expect an upset win for True Grit's Hailee Steinfeld, ironically a lead performance. I'm not all that psyched for James Franco & Anne Hathaway as hosts (call me traditional, but I'd rather see Billy Crystal up there), but maybe they will surprise. The rest of the evening is comprised of insufferable red carpet interviews, multiple montages (as always I look forward to the Memorial Tribute, even though it often disappoints), several speeches from behind-the-scenes technical category winners, and a multitude of musical numbers.
Rather than an endless prediction thread that will take 10 hours to write, I've decided to list my personal top 10 of last year, as well as the year's 5 worst films, and a few very guilty pleasures. 2010 wasn't a great year at the movies, but it was a solid one with many films that will eventually find their way onto my dvd shelf. One of the major perks of my job is access to free rentals, which I'm proud to say I took full advantage of. I watched 68 movies released in 2010 (about 1/2 of which would at least merit a recommendation), which averages to roughly 136 hours spent in front of the tv or in a dark theater. That represents slightly more than 5 full days of the year, which is actually lower than I would've guessed. I watch far less tv than I used to (living 20 straight months without cable will do that), but factoring in reruns, sporting events, and old movies, I'm sure the actual total is closer to 10 days, still not too shabby. 10/365 is only 2.7% of my breathing time, which to some might sound high, but I think I deserve a pat on the back. :) But enough with the unofficial statistics . . .
THIS SUCKS! It's 11:30 AM Oscar Sunday and I have to leave for work for most of the afternoon. I really need to work on my planning. Because it makes little sense to post the top paragraph after tonight's show, I'm gonna have to split this into a 2-parter. Sorry. The best films of 2010 will be forthcoming in part 2 (this week I swear). It will also provide an oppurtinity to criticize any particularly awful choices tonight.
Rather than an endless prediction thread that will take 10 hours to write, I've decided to list my personal top 10 of last year, as well as the year's 5 worst films, and a few very guilty pleasures. 2010 wasn't a great year at the movies, but it was a solid one with many films that will eventually find their way onto my dvd shelf. One of the major perks of my job is access to free rentals, which I'm proud to say I took full advantage of. I watched 68 movies released in 2010 (about 1/2 of which would at least merit a recommendation), which averages to roughly 136 hours spent in front of the tv or in a dark theater. That represents slightly more than 5 full days of the year, which is actually lower than I would've guessed. I watch far less tv than I used to (living 20 straight months without cable will do that), but factoring in reruns, sporting events, and old movies, I'm sure the actual total is closer to 10 days, still not too shabby. 10/365 is only 2.7% of my breathing time, which to some might sound high, but I think I deserve a pat on the back. :) But enough with the unofficial statistics . . .
THIS SUCKS! It's 11:30 AM Oscar Sunday and I have to leave for work for most of the afternoon. I really need to work on my planning. Because it makes little sense to post the top paragraph after tonight's show, I'm gonna have to split this into a 2-parter. Sorry. The best films of 2010 will be forthcoming in part 2 (this week I swear). It will also provide an oppurtinity to criticize any particularly awful choices tonight.
Thursday, January 6, 2011
Time to Say Good-Bye, Pt. II
Ok, it took longer than a couple of days to post again (in fact last night was the Super Bowl), but this is still an improvement. I hope everyone had a wonderful New Year's celebration and was able to take something memorable from the most overrated night on the calendar. T & I decided to stay in, play some games (she won all of them!), drink some wine, and chow down some h'orderves. We suffered through some bad television coverage from Carson Daly and Ryan Seacrest (both of whom continue to defy the odds by escaping unemployment), but on the whole it was a mellow night without incident. Considering my personal New Year's Eve history, that's saying something. Now let's get back to those we've lost, focusing on the world of sports, and beginning with the greatest fictional manager who ever lived:
James Gammon (70): Versatile character actor I'll always remember for his portrayal of Lou Brown, manager of the Cleveland Indians in the funniest baseball movie ever made, Major League ('89). Sometimes a memorable character is born through unique delivery of dialogue and Gammon's performance as the gruff, irritable former 'Tire World' employee goes down as one of my favorites ever! A few classically delivered favorite lines . . .
At lead-off man Willie Mays Hayes: "You may run like Hayes, but you hit like shit."
At pansy veteran Roger Dorn: "Come on Dorn get in front of the damn ball! Don't give me this "olé" bullshit!"
Regarding the press: "I'm not much for giving inspirational addresses, but I'd just like to point out that every newspaper in the country has picked us to finish last. The local press seems to think that we'd save everyone a lot of time and trouble if we, just went out and shot ourselves. Me, I'm for wasting sportswriters' time. So I figured we ought to hang around for a while and see if we can give 'em all a nice big shitburger to eat!"
And a personal favorite I use on a weekly basis, even though T never has any idea what I'm talking about: "Oh, this old body could use a soak."
Ok, now onto some real life athletes (excluding Brett Favre, whom I never need to hear about again):
Allen Iverson: Not officially retired, but after the NBA showed no interest, Iverson took his aging body to Besiktas in Turkey of all places, recently returning to the U.S. for surgery to remove a lesion from his leg. This would be a sad ending to one of the great careers in NBA history, but hopefully A.I. will be back.
Amir Vahidi (49): Is poker a sport? Not even I would admit that. But Vahidi left one of the largest impressions in the tournament (2003 WSOP) that brought no limit Texas hold 'em to the attention of the masses and helped spawn the poker boom.
Bobby Thomson (86): Best known for the famed "Shot Heard 'Round the World," his game winning 3-run homer that won the 1951 National League pennant for the Giants.
Bob Feller (92): Huge news in Cleveland when the pitching great died last month following a battle with leukemia. Despite losing four prime years to the Navy following the attack on Pearl Harbor, Feller threw 3 career no-hitters and an amazing 44 shutouts. He won 266 games with a 3.25 earned run average and is widely regarded as one of the best pitchers of all-time.
Chuck Daily (78): The Hall of Fame coach led the Detroit Pistons to back-to-back titles in the late 80s before coaching the original Dream Team to an Olympic gold medal in 1992. And my brother will forever believe he has a 'thing' for Patrick Ewing :)
Dom DiMaggio (92): Great center fielder who played his entire 11 year career for the Boston Red Sox. Despite playing in the shadow of teammate Ted Williams and older brother Joe, Dom earned a reputation as one of his era's finest lead-off men and defensive outfielders. Like Feller, DiMaggio lost prime years to the Navy, but the 7-time All-Star finished with a .298 career average, twice leading the American League in runs scored. He made the Red Sox Hall of Fame in 1995.
Don Meredith (72): My Dad was unusually melancholy when hearing of Meredith's death. The former Dallas Cowboys quarterback threw for over 17,000 career yards, but is probably best remembered for his work as part of the Monday Night Football broadcast crew opposite Howard Cosell and Frank Gifford.
George Steinbrenner (80) I absolutely hate the phrase "love to hate," because it's a media created inoffensive bullshit term meant to turn attention away from the fact that we actually hate people when we use it. ESPN.com started using it a few years ago with every single poll they posted. To clarify, I don't "love to hate" Reggie Miller. Rather the sheer site of his ugly, bald freak-face makes me want to gouge his eyes out and feed them to pigeons in the park. What does this have to do with Steinbrenner? Well, for a time I hated the renowned Yankees owner, mostly because for the better part of my life the Red Sox couldn't climb out from under his considerable shadow. But when we started emulating his outrageous spending formula and started winning World Series, it became a little easier to appreciate Steinbrenner's accomplishments (including 7 World Series titles), even if he stole his nickname from Bruce Springsteen. He also inspired a completely silly, incompetent bozo-version of himself, voiced by Larry David on Seinfeld.
John Wooden (99): Best basketball coach of all-time? I'll respectfully stick with Red Auerbach, but I wouldn't yell at anyone who gave the title to Wooden. He is indisputably the greatest collegiate athletic coach ever, winning 7 consecutive national championships at UCLA and 10 in 12 years! This period included an unthinkable 88-game winning streak featuring centers Kareem Abdul-Jabbar and Bill Walton.
Manute Bol (47): Perhaps the strangest looking athlete of all-time, the 7' 6" Sudanese-born center became one of the best shot-blockers in the history of the NBA. He often averaged more blocks than points per game, wore shoe size 16 1/2, and became an unlikely attraction for both serious and casual fans alike. He became a revered political activist following and during his basketball career.
Steve McNair (36): The longtime Tennessee Titans quarterback was tragically shot and killed by his mistress in one of the strangest news stories of 2009. McNair was the Titan's all-time leading passer, the NFL Co-MVP in 2003, and led his team against the St. Louis Rams in one of the most exciting Super Bowl finishes ever (2000).
Sparky Anderson (76): Hall of Fame manager who finished his career with 2,194 wins. Anderson won 3 World Series rings as manager, the 1st 2 coming back-to-back in the mid-70s with a historically great Cincinnati Reds team (the '75 series is regarded among the best ever). He added a 3rd championship in 1984 with the Detroit Tigers.
Wayman Tisdale (44): One of my favorite random basketball players of the last 20 years. Tisdale was a 3-time All-American at Oklahoma before becoming the 2nd overall pick in the 1985 NBA draft (Karl Malone went 13th, but whatever). A left-handed power forward, the extremely likeable Tisdale played his best years with the Sacramento Kings before retiring to focus on a jazz career. He just seemed like a cool guy. I'm convinced the writers of 1991's Strictly Business stole his name for their lead character, but it has never been proven.
And finally, 2 huge baseball retirements that flew far under the radar;
Ken Griffey Jr.: It's difficult to determine just how revered Griffey might've been had he stayed healthy. I honestly can't even remember the last time he was considered relevant (he left Seattle for Cincinnati over a decade ago!), which is a mixed blessing. On the one hand he avoided the steroid era and the resulting ugly cloud that looms over many of his contemporaries. His career basically split in two parts, the 1st historically great and the 2nd somewhat forgettable. Despite all the time missed he amassed 630 homeruns (5th all-time), 13 All-star selections, an MVP award, & 10 Gold Glove Awards (often cited as the finest defensive outfielder of the 90s). He was an icon embraced by younger baseball fans for his exuberance, his backwards cap, and a lefty swing considered the purest in baseball. I still remember his 1989 Upper Deck rookie card, a prized collection item. This year he played his last game without the fanfare surrounding several of his peers and despite his accomplishments it's easy to consider his career a disappointment in some respects. Injuries are the most frustrating limitators, because they are largely involuntary. Just know that when Griffey's name reaches the Hall of Fame ballot in 2015, his reception will be envied by the likes of Bonds, Clemens, McGwire, et al., who will themselves be wondering what might've been.
Nomar Garciaparra: 10 years ago I would've bet anything that Nomah would one day join a select list of Boston sports demigods named Russell, Teddy, Bobby, and Larry. The '97 AL Rookie of the Year has since been passed by guys named Brady, Papi, & Pierce. I still remember getting the phone call that Nomar had been traded while walking through Faneuil Hall that summer in 2004. Even though he'd clearly been unhappy with recent treatment relating to contract negotiations (at the time I agreed with him), it still seemed unthinkable that the Red Sox would part ways with the former back-to-back batting champion (he hit a ridiculous .357 & .372 in '99 & '00). Skeptics have suggested he was a victim of the famed Sports Illustrated curse, as a March 2001 cover featured a suddenly ripped Garciparra flexing topless. Indeed, just months after his trade to the Cubs, Boston broke the 86 year curse and won the World Series. Regardless, the nationwide debates over who was baseball's greatest shortstop (A-Rod, Nomar, & Derek Jeter) seem like a lifetime ago. At that time, the longtime Yankee routinely finished 3rd; today he's the only one who's a lock for Cooperstown. Last March Nomar signed a one-day contract with the Red Sox so he could retire with the franchise he considered home. I will always cheer Nomar Garciaparra.
And in the end . . . . .
Siskel & Ebert (At the Movies): The longtime movie review show disappeared quietly in 2010, sad news to all who appreciate the film going experience. When I was in High School I imagined one day becoming a professional film critic and even saved a computer document detailing short paragraph reviews of movies I saw in 1996 in particular (I remember thinking A Time to Kill and Independence Day were two of the best movies I'd seen to that point). From there I began writing the occasional review for Newton South's 'Denebola'. The interest continued sporadically in college, as I submitted a few reviews for the Trinity College 'Tripod,' all freshman year. If my motivation for writing full reviews dimmed, my enthusiasm for going to the movies did not, and today I remain as opinionated as ever. Chicago film critics Gene Siskel and Roger Ebert began their syndicated program in 1986 (they'd worked together since 1975 with 'Sneak Previews') and displayed great chemistry, despite arguing frequently. Their passion for their work was always evident and provided great entertainment for the rest of us, as well as smart recommendations. Their slogan "Two Thumbs Up/Down" became a legitimate barometer for how a film might perform critically and commercially. The pair also formed a close relationship with David Letterman, who regularly had them as guests. When Siskel died in 1999, Ebert kept the show going, eventually choosing another Chicago critic Richard Roeper, as his replacement. While not quite the same, the show continued to do well until Ebert too suffered health problems, leaving Roeper as the anchor. Since his departure the show featured substitute hosts both good (A.O.Scott & Michael Phillips) and bad (Ben Lyons & Ben Mankiewicz). After shuffling air dates and times repeatedly (when will network executives realize this is NEVER a good idea?), the show was cancelled, the finale airing on August 14th, 2010. Fortunately many of the greatest moments and reviews from Siskel & Ebert are available on YouTube for a younger generation to experience.
Dennis Hopper (74): One of the great psychotic actors of his generation, perhaps ever. After early appearances in a pair of James Dean films (Rebel without a Cause & Giant), Hopper shot to fame directing and co-starring in 1969's independent counterculture sensation Easy Rider, which also introduced the world to Jack Nicholson. The charismatic actor spent much of the next two decades battling drug abuse, though it often resulted in memorable performances. It's almost impossible not to believe he was on drugs as the motor-mouthed photojournalist in Apocalypse Now ('79), or most memorably as villain Frank Booth in Blue Velvet ('86). That same year he was Oscar-nominated for his terrific role as the alcoholic basketball fanatic Shooter in Hoosiers. The mid-90s brought a 2nd career revival with strong supporting turns in 1993's True Romance (his scene with Christopher Walken is a classic) and 1994's Speed as the mad bomber. He played another lunatic villain the next year in Waterworld. Hopper was also prolific on television for several decades, with appearances on Gunsmoke, Bonanza, The Twilight Zone, 24, Entourage, and most recently as the lead on the Starz network's Crash. In a business where too many actors are carbon copies of those who came before, Hopper was an original.
Leslie Nielsen (84): Whenever I need a pick-me-up, I YouTube (when did that become a verb?) the opening scene from The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad! It's so great that I considered posting it illegally, as it features Nielsen's Lt. Frank Drebin spying on a meeting amongst the world's most infamous leaders before single-handedly beating the crap out of all of them, revealing his identity, and offering the warning, "And don't ever let me catch you guys in America!" The secret to Nielsen's success as a comic actor was his ability to keep a straight face in the midst of pure silliness. He delivered dialogue matter-of-factly, even lines as ridiculous as "Oh, and one more thing... I faked every orgasm!" following a fight with girlfriend Jane. It helped that Nielsen in fact started as a dramatic actor in the 1950s, appearing in dozens of serious TV and film roles over the next two decades. But the huge success of Airplane (1980) changed the trajectory of Nielsen's career, playing Dr. Rumack in the middle of a plane full of violently ill passengers. In that endlessly quotable comedy, several prominent actors (including Robert Stack and Lloyd Bridges) volunteered to play against type, leading to exchanges like this one . . .
Rumack: "Captain, how soon can you land?"
Captain Oveur: "I can't tell."
Rumack: "You can tell me. I'm a doctor."
The humor was so obvious that it could be as easily appreciated by an 8 year old as a 68 year old. By the end of the 80s Nielsen had become the face of movie spoofs (his hit franchise a spin-off of the cancelled 1982 show Police Squad, featuring many of the same characters and creative people), but it takes an actor of a certain genius to pull off what he did. From this perspective, Nielsen was no less valuable to comedy than Marlon Brando was to drama fifty years ago. If you don't believe me, try sitting through the latest offering from the Wayans Brothers, or better yet those awful Freidberg/Seltzer productions (Date Movie, Epic Movie, etc...). In the wrong hands, spoofs are often unwatchable. But Nielsen was the master of this subgenre, and warrants mention with the great comic actors of his time. Need more proof? I offer the all-time greatest rendition of the national anthem, and if my blog gets flagged, so be it . . . http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=poIRktlowCM
About a month ago T and I were boarding an airplane returning from New Orleans, and got stuck in line near the plane entrance. As I waited patiently, I considered leaning into the cockpit to say "I just wanted to tell you both good luck, we're all counting on you." I'm pretty sure they would've laughed (or arrested me). My money's on the former, but it wasn't worth the gamble.
LOST: In a year of notable television exits (Law & Order and 24 also ended in 2010), none drew the attention of ABC's Lost. The science-fiction drama which began in 2004 with the most expensive pilot ever green-lit soon became one of the most closely scrutinized programs in television history and for good reason. Created by J.J. Abrams, Jeffrey Lieber, & Damon Lindelof, the plot followed the survivors of Oceanic flight 815, which crash landed on a mysterious island en route from Sydney to Los Angeles. The show shifted between conflict and relationship building on the island with back stories in the normal lives for each of the dozens of characters. Meanwhile, questions regarding the enigmas and very existence of the island itself took hold of viewers and became a driving force of intrigue. The show's writing was often brilliant, as mysteries and apparent coincidences were used to explore deeper philosophies involving fate vs. free will. Jack (Matthew Fox) was often the moral center of the show, though the doctor's dependence on fact and logic often came to blows with Locke (Terry O'Quinn), who believed things happened for a reason. Locke probably goes down as one of the 5 most interesting television characters ever, although he wasn't alone. Viewers became so invested in the lives of Kate, Sawyer, Hurley, Desmond, Sayid, Jin, Sun, etc... that they forgave the occasional slip-up in credibility (whatever happened to Walt?). I myself preferred the show's first 3 seasons, which were far more survival-oriented than the last 3.
If there was a shade of disappointment after Lost ended (other than not being able to see it live - more on this in a minute), it's because for a while I thought it was on its way to become the greatest television show of all-time. It didn't quite get there for a few reasons, one being that the writers (Lindelof & Carlton Cuse) opened more mysteries than could reasonably be explained, even on an island that bended the rules. Once season 3 closed with a flash-forward (a fascinating idea at the time), the creators were essentially warning us that they might try anything. A questionable reliance on time travel almost lost (no pun intended) T and I during season 5, when relationships changed, the setting expanded to multiple decades, and we were forced to follow Faraday's notebook detailing the construction of an atomic bomb. For a show that was already 'out there,' it went way too far out there. Season 6 mellowed things a bit, though it brought a flash sideways to further confuse the issue and ended with questions of life, death, and purgatory (which itself led to debates over what the latter term meant, there were at least 5 phone calls on the issue).
Note: As I mentioned, we were unable to see the Lost finale live, which did untold damage to our opinion of the ending. We planned an evening around that night only to have it ruined by technical difficulties at ABC throughout greater Cleveland. The choppy broadcast skipped and froze, disregarding entire scenes, eventually leading to me screaming and turning it off. The local network was flooded with emails and calls from furious fans, prompting a public apology and subsequent re-airing a few days later, but the damage had been done. Seriously, where else besides Cleveland could this happen? We joke about the city being cursed following years of sports-related embarrassments (the latest being the Cavaliers breaking the all-time losing streak record in professional basketball with 24 STRAIGHT LOSSES!!!), but this was eerie. Did Lost have the power to choose not to broadcast itself? It's a spooky question and indeed just weeks ago the Mega Millions lottery featured 4 of 6 numbers matching the pattern Hurley became obsessed with on the show (4,8,15,16,23,42), leading to over 9,000 winners.
At the end of the day, trying to explain the show's plot to someone would only make me sound ridiculous for liking it in the first place (Um, it's about a murderous smoke monster, two opposing brothers with powers, a polar bear, betrayals, women who can't reproduce, drugs, bombs, curing the handicapped, a band called Drive Shaft, a love triangle, a soulless con-man, crazy French women, torture, visions, mysterious voices, poorly made rafts, submarines, wild hogs, and the dharma initiative). It's impossible to defend in this regard. But what stand out are the performances (one of the strongest ensembles in history), the ambitious writing, and the dramatic moments that had us glued to our television sets every week. Many series would be thrilled to have a memorable scene or two. Lost had dozens, from the pilot episode plane crash to the opening of the hatch, from Benjamin Linus' identity revelation to Juliet's fall, from Eko's showdown with Smokey to the boat explosion, to Charlie's drowning, a death scene that ranks with the greatest ever on TV or film. I don't remember another show that delivered on a more satisfying dramatic or emotional level, even if it did so inconsistently. And after rewatching the finale on DVD, I realized they really did find the right ending after all (each character remembering their lives on the island, plus the closing shot on Jack was perfect). In the end, television was better for having a phenomenon that not only entertained, but challenged the intellect. I may even watch it all over again and would encourage you to do the same.
See you next year
James Gammon (70): Versatile character actor I'll always remember for his portrayal of Lou Brown, manager of the Cleveland Indians in the funniest baseball movie ever made, Major League ('89). Sometimes a memorable character is born through unique delivery of dialogue and Gammon's performance as the gruff, irritable former 'Tire World' employee goes down as one of my favorites ever! A few classically delivered favorite lines . . .
At lead-off man Willie Mays Hayes: "You may run like Hayes, but you hit like shit."
At pansy veteran Roger Dorn: "Come on Dorn get in front of the damn ball! Don't give me this "olé" bullshit!"
Regarding the press: "I'm not much for giving inspirational addresses, but I'd just like to point out that every newspaper in the country has picked us to finish last. The local press seems to think that we'd save everyone a lot of time and trouble if we, just went out and shot ourselves. Me, I'm for wasting sportswriters' time. So I figured we ought to hang around for a while and see if we can give 'em all a nice big shitburger to eat!"
And a personal favorite I use on a weekly basis, even though T never has any idea what I'm talking about: "Oh, this old body could use a soak."
Ok, now onto some real life athletes (excluding Brett Favre, whom I never need to hear about again):
Allen Iverson: Not officially retired, but after the NBA showed no interest, Iverson took his aging body to Besiktas in Turkey of all places, recently returning to the U.S. for surgery to remove a lesion from his leg. This would be a sad ending to one of the great careers in NBA history, but hopefully A.I. will be back.
Amir Vahidi (49): Is poker a sport? Not even I would admit that. But Vahidi left one of the largest impressions in the tournament (2003 WSOP) that brought no limit Texas hold 'em to the attention of the masses and helped spawn the poker boom.
Bobby Thomson (86): Best known for the famed "Shot Heard 'Round the World," his game winning 3-run homer that won the 1951 National League pennant for the Giants.
Bob Feller (92): Huge news in Cleveland when the pitching great died last month following a battle with leukemia. Despite losing four prime years to the Navy following the attack on Pearl Harbor, Feller threw 3 career no-hitters and an amazing 44 shutouts. He won 266 games with a 3.25 earned run average and is widely regarded as one of the best pitchers of all-time.
Chuck Daily (78): The Hall of Fame coach led the Detroit Pistons to back-to-back titles in the late 80s before coaching the original Dream Team to an Olympic gold medal in 1992. And my brother will forever believe he has a 'thing' for Patrick Ewing :)
Dom DiMaggio (92): Great center fielder who played his entire 11 year career for the Boston Red Sox. Despite playing in the shadow of teammate Ted Williams and older brother Joe, Dom earned a reputation as one of his era's finest lead-off men and defensive outfielders. Like Feller, DiMaggio lost prime years to the Navy, but the 7-time All-Star finished with a .298 career average, twice leading the American League in runs scored. He made the Red Sox Hall of Fame in 1995.
Don Meredith (72): My Dad was unusually melancholy when hearing of Meredith's death. The former Dallas Cowboys quarterback threw for over 17,000 career yards, but is probably best remembered for his work as part of the Monday Night Football broadcast crew opposite Howard Cosell and Frank Gifford.
George Steinbrenner (80) I absolutely hate the phrase "love to hate," because it's a media created inoffensive bullshit term meant to turn attention away from the fact that we actually hate people when we use it. ESPN.com started using it a few years ago with every single poll they posted. To clarify, I don't "love to hate" Reggie Miller. Rather the sheer site of his ugly, bald freak-face makes me want to gouge his eyes out and feed them to pigeons in the park. What does this have to do with Steinbrenner? Well, for a time I hated the renowned Yankees owner, mostly because for the better part of my life the Red Sox couldn't climb out from under his considerable shadow. But when we started emulating his outrageous spending formula and started winning World Series, it became a little easier to appreciate Steinbrenner's accomplishments (including 7 World Series titles), even if he stole his nickname from Bruce Springsteen. He also inspired a completely silly, incompetent bozo-version of himself, voiced by Larry David on Seinfeld.
John Wooden (99): Best basketball coach of all-time? I'll respectfully stick with Red Auerbach, but I wouldn't yell at anyone who gave the title to Wooden. He is indisputably the greatest collegiate athletic coach ever, winning 7 consecutive national championships at UCLA and 10 in 12 years! This period included an unthinkable 88-game winning streak featuring centers Kareem Abdul-Jabbar and Bill Walton.
Manute Bol (47): Perhaps the strangest looking athlete of all-time, the 7' 6" Sudanese-born center became one of the best shot-blockers in the history of the NBA. He often averaged more blocks than points per game, wore shoe size 16 1/2, and became an unlikely attraction for both serious and casual fans alike. He became a revered political activist following and during his basketball career.
Steve McNair (36): The longtime Tennessee Titans quarterback was tragically shot and killed by his mistress in one of the strangest news stories of 2009. McNair was the Titan's all-time leading passer, the NFL Co-MVP in 2003, and led his team against the St. Louis Rams in one of the most exciting Super Bowl finishes ever (2000).
Sparky Anderson (76): Hall of Fame manager who finished his career with 2,194 wins. Anderson won 3 World Series rings as manager, the 1st 2 coming back-to-back in the mid-70s with a historically great Cincinnati Reds team (the '75 series is regarded among the best ever). He added a 3rd championship in 1984 with the Detroit Tigers.
Wayman Tisdale (44): One of my favorite random basketball players of the last 20 years. Tisdale was a 3-time All-American at Oklahoma before becoming the 2nd overall pick in the 1985 NBA draft (Karl Malone went 13th, but whatever). A left-handed power forward, the extremely likeable Tisdale played his best years with the Sacramento Kings before retiring to focus on a jazz career. He just seemed like a cool guy. I'm convinced the writers of 1991's Strictly Business stole his name for their lead character, but it has never been proven.
And finally, 2 huge baseball retirements that flew far under the radar;
Ken Griffey Jr.: It's difficult to determine just how revered Griffey might've been had he stayed healthy. I honestly can't even remember the last time he was considered relevant (he left Seattle for Cincinnati over a decade ago!), which is a mixed blessing. On the one hand he avoided the steroid era and the resulting ugly cloud that looms over many of his contemporaries. His career basically split in two parts, the 1st historically great and the 2nd somewhat forgettable. Despite all the time missed he amassed 630 homeruns (5th all-time), 13 All-star selections, an MVP award, & 10 Gold Glove Awards (often cited as the finest defensive outfielder of the 90s). He was an icon embraced by younger baseball fans for his exuberance, his backwards cap, and a lefty swing considered the purest in baseball. I still remember his 1989 Upper Deck rookie card, a prized collection item. This year he played his last game without the fanfare surrounding several of his peers and despite his accomplishments it's easy to consider his career a disappointment in some respects. Injuries are the most frustrating limitators, because they are largely involuntary. Just know that when Griffey's name reaches the Hall of Fame ballot in 2015, his reception will be envied by the likes of Bonds, Clemens, McGwire, et al., who will themselves be wondering what might've been.
Nomar Garciaparra: 10 years ago I would've bet anything that Nomah would one day join a select list of Boston sports demigods named Russell, Teddy, Bobby, and Larry. The '97 AL Rookie of the Year has since been passed by guys named Brady, Papi, & Pierce. I still remember getting the phone call that Nomar had been traded while walking through Faneuil Hall that summer in 2004. Even though he'd clearly been unhappy with recent treatment relating to contract negotiations (at the time I agreed with him), it still seemed unthinkable that the Red Sox would part ways with the former back-to-back batting champion (he hit a ridiculous .357 & .372 in '99 & '00). Skeptics have suggested he was a victim of the famed Sports Illustrated curse, as a March 2001 cover featured a suddenly ripped Garciparra flexing topless. Indeed, just months after his trade to the Cubs, Boston broke the 86 year curse and won the World Series. Regardless, the nationwide debates over who was baseball's greatest shortstop (A-Rod, Nomar, & Derek Jeter) seem like a lifetime ago. At that time, the longtime Yankee routinely finished 3rd; today he's the only one who's a lock for Cooperstown. Last March Nomar signed a one-day contract with the Red Sox so he could retire with the franchise he considered home. I will always cheer Nomar Garciaparra.
And in the end . . . . .
Siskel & Ebert (At the Movies): The longtime movie review show disappeared quietly in 2010, sad news to all who appreciate the film going experience. When I was in High School I imagined one day becoming a professional film critic and even saved a computer document detailing short paragraph reviews of movies I saw in 1996 in particular (I remember thinking A Time to Kill and Independence Day were two of the best movies I'd seen to that point). From there I began writing the occasional review for Newton South's 'Denebola'. The interest continued sporadically in college, as I submitted a few reviews for the Trinity College 'Tripod,' all freshman year. If my motivation for writing full reviews dimmed, my enthusiasm for going to the movies did not, and today I remain as opinionated as ever. Chicago film critics Gene Siskel and Roger Ebert began their syndicated program in 1986 (they'd worked together since 1975 with 'Sneak Previews') and displayed great chemistry, despite arguing frequently. Their passion for their work was always evident and provided great entertainment for the rest of us, as well as smart recommendations. Their slogan "Two Thumbs Up/Down" became a legitimate barometer for how a film might perform critically and commercially. The pair also formed a close relationship with David Letterman, who regularly had them as guests. When Siskel died in 1999, Ebert kept the show going, eventually choosing another Chicago critic Richard Roeper, as his replacement. While not quite the same, the show continued to do well until Ebert too suffered health problems, leaving Roeper as the anchor. Since his departure the show featured substitute hosts both good (A.O.Scott & Michael Phillips) and bad (Ben Lyons & Ben Mankiewicz). After shuffling air dates and times repeatedly (when will network executives realize this is NEVER a good idea?), the show was cancelled, the finale airing on August 14th, 2010. Fortunately many of the greatest moments and reviews from Siskel & Ebert are available on YouTube for a younger generation to experience.
Dennis Hopper (74): One of the great psychotic actors of his generation, perhaps ever. After early appearances in a pair of James Dean films (Rebel without a Cause & Giant), Hopper shot to fame directing and co-starring in 1969's independent counterculture sensation Easy Rider, which also introduced the world to Jack Nicholson. The charismatic actor spent much of the next two decades battling drug abuse, though it often resulted in memorable performances. It's almost impossible not to believe he was on drugs as the motor-mouthed photojournalist in Apocalypse Now ('79), or most memorably as villain Frank Booth in Blue Velvet ('86). That same year he was Oscar-nominated for his terrific role as the alcoholic basketball fanatic Shooter in Hoosiers. The mid-90s brought a 2nd career revival with strong supporting turns in 1993's True Romance (his scene with Christopher Walken is a classic) and 1994's Speed as the mad bomber. He played another lunatic villain the next year in Waterworld. Hopper was also prolific on television for several decades, with appearances on Gunsmoke, Bonanza, The Twilight Zone, 24, Entourage, and most recently as the lead on the Starz network's Crash. In a business where too many actors are carbon copies of those who came before, Hopper was an original.
Leslie Nielsen (84): Whenever I need a pick-me-up, I YouTube (when did that become a verb?) the opening scene from The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad! It's so great that I considered posting it illegally, as it features Nielsen's Lt. Frank Drebin spying on a meeting amongst the world's most infamous leaders before single-handedly beating the crap out of all of them, revealing his identity, and offering the warning, "And don't ever let me catch you guys in America!" The secret to Nielsen's success as a comic actor was his ability to keep a straight face in the midst of pure silliness. He delivered dialogue matter-of-factly, even lines as ridiculous as "Oh, and one more thing... I faked every orgasm!" following a fight with girlfriend Jane. It helped that Nielsen in fact started as a dramatic actor in the 1950s, appearing in dozens of serious TV and film roles over the next two decades. But the huge success of Airplane (1980) changed the trajectory of Nielsen's career, playing Dr. Rumack in the middle of a plane full of violently ill passengers. In that endlessly quotable comedy, several prominent actors (including Robert Stack and Lloyd Bridges) volunteered to play against type, leading to exchanges like this one . . .
Rumack: "Captain, how soon can you land?"
Captain Oveur: "I can't tell."
Rumack: "You can tell me. I'm a doctor."
The humor was so obvious that it could be as easily appreciated by an 8 year old as a 68 year old. By the end of the 80s Nielsen had become the face of movie spoofs (his hit franchise a spin-off of the cancelled 1982 show Police Squad, featuring many of the same characters and creative people), but it takes an actor of a certain genius to pull off what he did. From this perspective, Nielsen was no less valuable to comedy than Marlon Brando was to drama fifty years ago. If you don't believe me, try sitting through the latest offering from the Wayans Brothers, or better yet those awful Freidberg/Seltzer productions (Date Movie, Epic Movie, etc...). In the wrong hands, spoofs are often unwatchable. But Nielsen was the master of this subgenre, and warrants mention with the great comic actors of his time. Need more proof? I offer the all-time greatest rendition of the national anthem, and if my blog gets flagged, so be it . . . http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=poIRktlowCM
About a month ago T and I were boarding an airplane returning from New Orleans, and got stuck in line near the plane entrance. As I waited patiently, I considered leaning into the cockpit to say "I just wanted to tell you both good luck, we're all counting on you." I'm pretty sure they would've laughed (or arrested me). My money's on the former, but it wasn't worth the gamble.
LOST: In a year of notable television exits (Law & Order and 24 also ended in 2010), none drew the attention of ABC's Lost. The science-fiction drama which began in 2004 with the most expensive pilot ever green-lit soon became one of the most closely scrutinized programs in television history and for good reason. Created by J.J. Abrams, Jeffrey Lieber, & Damon Lindelof, the plot followed the survivors of Oceanic flight 815, which crash landed on a mysterious island en route from Sydney to Los Angeles. The show shifted between conflict and relationship building on the island with back stories in the normal lives for each of the dozens of characters. Meanwhile, questions regarding the enigmas and very existence of the island itself took hold of viewers and became a driving force of intrigue. The show's writing was often brilliant, as mysteries and apparent coincidences were used to explore deeper philosophies involving fate vs. free will. Jack (Matthew Fox) was often the moral center of the show, though the doctor's dependence on fact and logic often came to blows with Locke (Terry O'Quinn), who believed things happened for a reason. Locke probably goes down as one of the 5 most interesting television characters ever, although he wasn't alone. Viewers became so invested in the lives of Kate, Sawyer, Hurley, Desmond, Sayid, Jin, Sun, etc... that they forgave the occasional slip-up in credibility (whatever happened to Walt?). I myself preferred the show's first 3 seasons, which were far more survival-oriented than the last 3.
If there was a shade of disappointment after Lost ended (other than not being able to see it live - more on this in a minute), it's because for a while I thought it was on its way to become the greatest television show of all-time. It didn't quite get there for a few reasons, one being that the writers (Lindelof & Carlton Cuse) opened more mysteries than could reasonably be explained, even on an island that bended the rules. Once season 3 closed with a flash-forward (a fascinating idea at the time), the creators were essentially warning us that they might try anything. A questionable reliance on time travel almost lost (no pun intended) T and I during season 5, when relationships changed, the setting expanded to multiple decades, and we were forced to follow Faraday's notebook detailing the construction of an atomic bomb. For a show that was already 'out there,' it went way too far out there. Season 6 mellowed things a bit, though it brought a flash sideways to further confuse the issue and ended with questions of life, death, and purgatory (which itself led to debates over what the latter term meant, there were at least 5 phone calls on the issue).
Note: As I mentioned, we were unable to see the Lost finale live, which did untold damage to our opinion of the ending. We planned an evening around that night only to have it ruined by technical difficulties at ABC throughout greater Cleveland. The choppy broadcast skipped and froze, disregarding entire scenes, eventually leading to me screaming and turning it off. The local network was flooded with emails and calls from furious fans, prompting a public apology and subsequent re-airing a few days later, but the damage had been done. Seriously, where else besides Cleveland could this happen? We joke about the city being cursed following years of sports-related embarrassments (the latest being the Cavaliers breaking the all-time losing streak record in professional basketball with 24 STRAIGHT LOSSES!!!), but this was eerie. Did Lost have the power to choose not to broadcast itself? It's a spooky question and indeed just weeks ago the Mega Millions lottery featured 4 of 6 numbers matching the pattern Hurley became obsessed with on the show (4,8,15,16,23,42), leading to over 9,000 winners.
At the end of the day, trying to explain the show's plot to someone would only make me sound ridiculous for liking it in the first place (Um, it's about a murderous smoke monster, two opposing brothers with powers, a polar bear, betrayals, women who can't reproduce, drugs, bombs, curing the handicapped, a band called Drive Shaft, a love triangle, a soulless con-man, crazy French women, torture, visions, mysterious voices, poorly made rafts, submarines, wild hogs, and the dharma initiative). It's impossible to defend in this regard. But what stand out are the performances (one of the strongest ensembles in history), the ambitious writing, and the dramatic moments that had us glued to our television sets every week. Many series would be thrilled to have a memorable scene or two. Lost had dozens, from the pilot episode plane crash to the opening of the hatch, from Benjamin Linus' identity revelation to Juliet's fall, from Eko's showdown with Smokey to the boat explosion, to Charlie's drowning, a death scene that ranks with the greatest ever on TV or film. I don't remember another show that delivered on a more satisfying dramatic or emotional level, even if it did so inconsistently. And after rewatching the finale on DVD, I realized they really did find the right ending after all (each character remembering their lives on the island, plus the closing shot on Jack was perfect). In the end, television was better for having a phenomenon that not only entertained, but challenged the intellect. I may even watch it all over again and would encourage you to do the same.
See you next year
Saturday, December 18, 2010
Time to Say Good-Bye, Pt. I
Leave it to Leslie Nielsen to get me back to writing. His unexpected death a few weeks ago left me deflated, knowing the world had lost one of the truly funny ones, someone who got 'it.' Comedy is of course subjective, but I don't think I want to be friends with anyone who doesn't find Nielsen funny. We just won't get along (more on Lt. Frank Drebin forthcoming)
It's been a remarkably busy year, as increasing work hours and responsiblities have often left me too tired to do much beyond flopping on the couch upon returning home. Meanwhile, T and I have been busy planning what promises to be the wedding bash of the century this coming May. It better be. As Father of the Bride's Steve Martin once said in his uniquely sarcastic voice, "I'm told that one day I'll look back on all this with great affection and nostalgia. I hope so." Anyone whoever said planning a wedding is easy is insane, though I must admit we are doing really well all things considered, in no small part due to T's diligence and strong sense of planning. As long as neither of us goes completely bankrupt or has a stress-induced seizure, I think we'll come out on top. After a successful New Orleans trip to check out accomodations, meet the Rabbi, and take 600 engagement pictures, it's time to slow down again, at least briefly. I apologize to my half-dozen readers for not posting a new blog since mid-July, but what better way to bring back the good cheer then to recollect all those who died in 2010? :) Actually looking back, I neglected my annual "good-bye" blog in 2009, not a great track record considering I have maybe 3 topics I cover annually. But after getting engaged last December, I hope you'll cut me some slack. I'll begin with some 2009 exits that meant something to me (excluding Michael Jackson, who received his own blog when he died), transition through several others of note from both years, and conclude with the most impactful deaths of 2010 in a follow-up blog this week.
2009
Conan O'Brien: Reason #1 why I need to be more time efficient. By the time I got to writing this, the Brookline, MA native was already back on cable. One of the huge entertainment related stories this decade involved Conan leaving his longtime run at Late Night for The Tonight Show, only to have it handed back to Jay Leno after ratings plummeted. The whole situation stunk, but Conan handled it with class offering a touching goodbye to his audience and winning the battle of public opinion. If there's some good to result from this fiasco, at least I no longer have to choose between Conan and Dave at 11:35. That would've been brutal.
E.R. (1994-2009): Somehow has slipped under the radar whenever the best television dramas are debated. Much of that had to do with cast changes, the limitations of network shows (as opposed to cable), and the fact that it stayed on the air at least five years too long. That last point is the primary reason it left tv quietly without the fanfare of equally popular contemporaries like Seinfeld and Friends. But during it's prime, E.R. was the most respected show on t.v., cleverly written and convincingly acted by a cast of future stars. It's documentary style presentation, revelatory in in the mid-90s, has influenced dozens of shows since. I only caught it sporadically in the beginning, but the show proves both compelling and addicting years later on dvd.
John Hughes (59): For a generation who grew up in the 80s, not even Spielberg could match Hughes as the most culturally relevant filmmaker in the business. He created more stars (at least for a while) than anyone. He didn't win prestigious awards, but his name was attached (as writer and/or director) to several of the most rewatchable films of all-time; The Breakfast Club, Home Alone, Planes Trains & Automobiles, & Sixteen Candles to name a few. Despite the inclusion of several lesser titles on his resume, anyone responsible for the creation of both Clark W. Griswold and Ferris Bueller has my admiration forever.
Papa Ginos (Needham St.): Reason #2 why I need to write faster. I remember getting the text from Mom, "Papa Ginos closed!" Living in Ohio, one wouldn't think I'd care about something so insignificant. But I texted her back within seconds. The funniest part is that my response was the slowest of the three Pava boys, who all received the same message simultaneously. The local pizza favorite has since been reopened across the street, but I can't imagine it'll ever be quite the same. Other than Charlie's, I'm not sure I've ever had more meals from a single restaurant in my life. It's a place from my childhood, a place of birthday parties, a favorite destination during high school free blocks, and owner of the best $7 chicken parmesan plate in history.
Patrick Swayze (57): Among the few actors who was able to find a successful balance between chick flicks and testosterone-fueled nonsense, Swayze was well liked by both genders. For every Dirty Dancing, there was a Road House. For every Ghost, there was a Point Break. He flourished in an era most commonly observed now through nostalgia, but he didn't disgrace himself like so many. Rather, he always conducted himself with decency and class. Cancer claimed him not long after his comeback into television.
Ted Kennedy (77): You know when someone matters? When a person feels compelled to say something about them without knowing almost anything. I found out about Kennedy's death at Foxwoods of all places in the summer of '09 and remember feeling shocked. I didn't really know his politics other than particular phrases and nicknames, nor his background, aside from his connections to Massachusetts and his famous siblings. I also remember when my babysitter once told me I reminded her of Jack Kennedy and I scoffed, thinking she meant the old, chubby one. But years later, I realize that either would've been a huge compliment.
The past two years were marked by an uncommon number of celebrity departures. Some were pioneers, others icons, and several were identified by a single work. A recap of many lost (bare with me, we're gonna get through this):
American Idol's Paula Abdul & Simon Cowell: Not sure where the show goes from here, but it's hard to ignore the impact of these two going head-to-head on the most popular television show of the last decade. Cowell's shoes in particular may be the hardest to fill in entertainment.
Alaina Reed-Hall (63): Olivia on Sesame Street
Al Martino (82): Singer, Johnny Fontane in The Godfather
Andrew Koenig (41): 'Boner' on Growing Pains
Arthur Penn (88): Director of Bonnie & Clyde, The Miracle Worker
Bea Arthur (86) & Rue McClanahan (76): acclaimed pair worked together on Maude in the 70s, then played Dorothy/Blanche respecitvely on the hugely popular, multi-Emmy winning sitcom The Golden Girls. The former was a Tony award winner, both won Emmys for acting.
Blake Edwards (88): Married to Julie Andrews; won Honorary Oscar for directorial body of work including Breakfast at Tiffany's, Days of Wine and Roses, & the popular Pink Panther films.
Brittany Murphy (32): Most famous for her role as Tai in 1995's Clueless. Other credits include Eight Mile & Don't Say a Word.
Corey Haim (38): 80s teen star and best friend of Cory Feldman, Haim fought drug addiction in his adult life. Film roles included the cult hit The Lost Boys, License to Drive, and Lucas, one of the underrated great films about high school relationships.
David Carradine (72): Caine in Kung Fu, title character in Quentin Tarantino's Kill Bill
Dom DeLuise (75): The first of several classic cameos in 1979's The Muppet Movie; joins Madeline Kahn, Anne Brancroft, & Harvey Korman amongst Mel Brooks collaborators no longer with us. At least we still have Gene Wilder.
Ed McMahon (86): Johnny Carson's longtime sidekick
Farrah Fawcett (62): TV Icon on Charlie's Angels, Emmy nominee, responsible for one of the most famous posters of all-time, battle with cancer was viewed by millions, had the misfortune of dying the same day as Michael Jackson.
STILL WITH ME? Ok, let's pause for a joke to recharge our batteries . . .
It was Christmas and the judge was in a merry mood as he asked the prisoner,"What are you charged with?"
"Doing my Christmas shopping early", replied the defendant."
"That's no offense", said the judge. "How early were you doing this shopping?"
"Before the store opened."
Continued . . .
Gary Coleman (42): child star as Arnold on Diff'rent Strokes, catchphrase "What'choo talkin' 'bout, Willis?" among the most famous in television history, later parodied in the hit Broadway musical Avenue Q
Gloria Stuart (100): Best known for The Invisible Man, elder Rose in Titanic
Harve Presnell (75): roles in Fargo, Face/Off, and Saving Private Ryan among others
Henry Gibson (73): Rowan & Martin's Laugh-In, Nazi leader in The Blues Brothers
Irvin Kershner (87): Director of the finest Star Wars film, 1980's The Empire Strikes Back
J.D.Salinger (91): Famously reclusive author, his 1951 novel The Catcher in the Rye remains one of the most famous and praised in the world. One of the few books I've liked enough to read more than once.
James Whitmore (87): Tony winner, academy award nominee, Brooks the librarian in The Shawshank Redemption; his closing message in that film 'Brooks was here," has already become an iconic quote in film history
Joseph Wiseman (91): Dr. No, title character and the 1st James Bond villain
Karl Malden (97): One of his era's most respected actors, he costarred with Marlon Brando in A Streetcar Named Desire (winning a Best Supporting Actor Oscar) & later turned in crucial performances in a pair of Best Picture winners, On the Waterfront (1954) and Patton (1970), before starring opposite a young Michael Douglas in TV's The Streets of San Francisco. Malden received the Screen Actors Guild Life Achievement Award in 2003.
Larry Gelbart (81): wrote several notable scripts; Oscar-nominated for Tootsie, co-creator/writer for TV's M*A*S*H
Lena Horne (92): Multiple Grammy winner, actress, and civil rights activist
Les Paul (94): one of the great guitar players and recording innovators; honored with permanent stand-alone exhibit in Cleveland's Rock and Roll Hall of Fame (thank you Wikipedia)
Maurice Jarre (84): among most prolific composers in cinema; score credits include Lawrence of Arabia, Doctor Zhivago, Ghost
JOKE BREAK #2 . . .
A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can.
Three years later, there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says "What the hell was that all about?"
Continued . . .
Maury Chaykin (61): one of the classic 'that guy's', My Cousin Vinny's ignorant witness; the volatile Harvey on Entourage
Natasha Richardson (45) & Lynn Redgrave (67): Two members of the famed Redgrave acting family, each excelled in television and film. Lynn was Vanessa Redgrave's sister, Natasha the latter's daughter and husband to Liam Neeson.
Patricia Neal (84): The Day the Earth Stood Still, Oscar winner (Best Actress) for Hud, playing opposite Paul Newman
Patrick McGoohan (80): TV's Danger Man & The Prisoner, played villainous Longshanks in best picture winner Braveheart
Peter Graves (83): star of TV's Mission: Impossible, clueless Captain Oveur in Airplane, responsible for one of the funniest exchanges movie history:
Captain Oveur: "You ever been in a cockpit before?"
Joey: "No sir, I've never been up in a plane before."
Captain Oveur: "You ever seen a grown man naked?"
Ricardo Montalban (88): Mr. Roarke on TV's Fantasy Island; Khan in Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, and Drebin's nemesis in the original Naked Gun. He received the Screen Actors Guild Life Achievement Award in 1993.
Ron Silver (62): looked like Al Pacino's brother, prolific career on tv and film
Roy Disney (79): Executive and lifelong member of the Walt Disney family; son of Roy, nephew of Walt; net worth over 1 billion
Steven Gilborn (72): Honestly can't tell you a single role, but his face was instantly recognizable; a staple of 80s/90s television, google the actor and you're sure to go "Ohhhh, him."
Soupy Sales (83): star of comedy sketch program in the 50s/60s, hit with more pies in the face than Milton Berle (unofficial stat)
Tom Bosley (83): Immortalized as 'Mr. C' on Happy Days, even if Mom says he was her least favorite member of the cast :(
Tony Curtis (85): Major movie star in the 50s/60s, fathered actress Jamie Lee Curtis with 1st wife Janet Leigh. Starring roles included Sweet Smell of Success, The Defiant Ones, & Billy Wilder's classic comedy Some Like it Hot opposite Jack Lemmon.
Walter Cronkite (92): CBS Evening News anchorman for two decades, Bruce Nolan's idol
Zelda Rubinstein (76): psychic in Poltergeist
Congratulations to anyone who reached the end of this post without coffee. Good-Bye, Pt. II will be posted in the next few days, highlighting some untimely sports exits and the big guns of 2010.
Thanks for reading, Happy New Year
It's been a remarkably busy year, as increasing work hours and responsiblities have often left me too tired to do much beyond flopping on the couch upon returning home. Meanwhile, T and I have been busy planning what promises to be the wedding bash of the century this coming May. It better be. As Father of the Bride's Steve Martin once said in his uniquely sarcastic voice, "I'm told that one day I'll look back on all this with great affection and nostalgia. I hope so." Anyone whoever said planning a wedding is easy is insane, though I must admit we are doing really well all things considered, in no small part due to T's diligence and strong sense of planning. As long as neither of us goes completely bankrupt or has a stress-induced seizure, I think we'll come out on top. After a successful New Orleans trip to check out accomodations, meet the Rabbi, and take 600 engagement pictures, it's time to slow down again, at least briefly. I apologize to my half-dozen readers for not posting a new blog since mid-July, but what better way to bring back the good cheer then to recollect all those who died in 2010? :) Actually looking back, I neglected my annual "good-bye" blog in 2009, not a great track record considering I have maybe 3 topics I cover annually. But after getting engaged last December, I hope you'll cut me some slack. I'll begin with some 2009 exits that meant something to me (excluding Michael Jackson, who received his own blog when he died), transition through several others of note from both years, and conclude with the most impactful deaths of 2010 in a follow-up blog this week.
2009
Conan O'Brien: Reason #1 why I need to be more time efficient. By the time I got to writing this, the Brookline, MA native was already back on cable. One of the huge entertainment related stories this decade involved Conan leaving his longtime run at Late Night for The Tonight Show, only to have it handed back to Jay Leno after ratings plummeted. The whole situation stunk, but Conan handled it with class offering a touching goodbye to his audience and winning the battle of public opinion. If there's some good to result from this fiasco, at least I no longer have to choose between Conan and Dave at 11:35. That would've been brutal.
E.R. (1994-2009): Somehow has slipped under the radar whenever the best television dramas are debated. Much of that had to do with cast changes, the limitations of network shows (as opposed to cable), and the fact that it stayed on the air at least five years too long. That last point is the primary reason it left tv quietly without the fanfare of equally popular contemporaries like Seinfeld and Friends. But during it's prime, E.R. was the most respected show on t.v., cleverly written and convincingly acted by a cast of future stars. It's documentary style presentation, revelatory in in the mid-90s, has influenced dozens of shows since. I only caught it sporadically in the beginning, but the show proves both compelling and addicting years later on dvd.
John Hughes (59): For a generation who grew up in the 80s, not even Spielberg could match Hughes as the most culturally relevant filmmaker in the business. He created more stars (at least for a while) than anyone. He didn't win prestigious awards, but his name was attached (as writer and/or director) to several of the most rewatchable films of all-time; The Breakfast Club, Home Alone, Planes Trains & Automobiles, & Sixteen Candles to name a few. Despite the inclusion of several lesser titles on his resume, anyone responsible for the creation of both Clark W. Griswold and Ferris Bueller has my admiration forever.
Papa Ginos (Needham St.): Reason #2 why I need to write faster. I remember getting the text from Mom, "Papa Ginos closed!" Living in Ohio, one wouldn't think I'd care about something so insignificant. But I texted her back within seconds. The funniest part is that my response was the slowest of the three Pava boys, who all received the same message simultaneously. The local pizza favorite has since been reopened across the street, but I can't imagine it'll ever be quite the same. Other than Charlie's, I'm not sure I've ever had more meals from a single restaurant in my life. It's a place from my childhood, a place of birthday parties, a favorite destination during high school free blocks, and owner of the best $7 chicken parmesan plate in history.
Patrick Swayze (57): Among the few actors who was able to find a successful balance between chick flicks and testosterone-fueled nonsense, Swayze was well liked by both genders. For every Dirty Dancing, there was a Road House. For every Ghost, there was a Point Break. He flourished in an era most commonly observed now through nostalgia, but he didn't disgrace himself like so many. Rather, he always conducted himself with decency and class. Cancer claimed him not long after his comeback into television.
Ted Kennedy (77): You know when someone matters? When a person feels compelled to say something about them without knowing almost anything. I found out about Kennedy's death at Foxwoods of all places in the summer of '09 and remember feeling shocked. I didn't really know his politics other than particular phrases and nicknames, nor his background, aside from his connections to Massachusetts and his famous siblings. I also remember when my babysitter once told me I reminded her of Jack Kennedy and I scoffed, thinking she meant the old, chubby one. But years later, I realize that either would've been a huge compliment.
The past two years were marked by an uncommon number of celebrity departures. Some were pioneers, others icons, and several were identified by a single work. A recap of many lost (bare with me, we're gonna get through this):
American Idol's Paula Abdul & Simon Cowell: Not sure where the show goes from here, but it's hard to ignore the impact of these two going head-to-head on the most popular television show of the last decade. Cowell's shoes in particular may be the hardest to fill in entertainment.
Alaina Reed-Hall (63): Olivia on Sesame Street
Al Martino (82): Singer, Johnny Fontane in The Godfather
Andrew Koenig (41): 'Boner' on Growing Pains
Arthur Penn (88): Director of Bonnie & Clyde, The Miracle Worker
Bea Arthur (86) & Rue McClanahan (76): acclaimed pair worked together on Maude in the 70s, then played Dorothy/Blanche respecitvely on the hugely popular, multi-Emmy winning sitcom The Golden Girls. The former was a Tony award winner, both won Emmys for acting.
Blake Edwards (88): Married to Julie Andrews; won Honorary Oscar for directorial body of work including Breakfast at Tiffany's, Days of Wine and Roses, & the popular Pink Panther films.
Brittany Murphy (32): Most famous for her role as Tai in 1995's Clueless. Other credits include Eight Mile & Don't Say a Word.
Corey Haim (38): 80s teen star and best friend of Cory Feldman, Haim fought drug addiction in his adult life. Film roles included the cult hit The Lost Boys, License to Drive, and Lucas, one of the underrated great films about high school relationships.
David Carradine (72): Caine in Kung Fu, title character in Quentin Tarantino's Kill Bill
Dom DeLuise (75): The first of several classic cameos in 1979's The Muppet Movie; joins Madeline Kahn, Anne Brancroft, & Harvey Korman amongst Mel Brooks collaborators no longer with us. At least we still have Gene Wilder.
Ed McMahon (86): Johnny Carson's longtime sidekick
Farrah Fawcett (62): TV Icon on Charlie's Angels, Emmy nominee, responsible for one of the most famous posters of all-time, battle with cancer was viewed by millions, had the misfortune of dying the same day as Michael Jackson.
STILL WITH ME? Ok, let's pause for a joke to recharge our batteries . . .
It was Christmas and the judge was in a merry mood as he asked the prisoner,"What are you charged with?"
"Doing my Christmas shopping early", replied the defendant."
"That's no offense", said the judge. "How early were you doing this shopping?"
"Before the store opened."
Continued . . .
Gary Coleman (42): child star as Arnold on Diff'rent Strokes, catchphrase "What'choo talkin' 'bout, Willis?" among the most famous in television history, later parodied in the hit Broadway musical Avenue Q
Gloria Stuart (100): Best known for The Invisible Man, elder Rose in Titanic
Harve Presnell (75): roles in Fargo, Face/Off, and Saving Private Ryan among others
Henry Gibson (73): Rowan & Martin's Laugh-In, Nazi leader in The Blues Brothers
Irvin Kershner (87): Director of the finest Star Wars film, 1980's The Empire Strikes Back
J.D.Salinger (91): Famously reclusive author, his 1951 novel The Catcher in the Rye remains one of the most famous and praised in the world. One of the few books I've liked enough to read more than once.
James Whitmore (87): Tony winner, academy award nominee, Brooks the librarian in The Shawshank Redemption; his closing message in that film 'Brooks was here," has already become an iconic quote in film history
Joseph Wiseman (91): Dr. No, title character and the 1st James Bond villain
Karl Malden (97): One of his era's most respected actors, he costarred with Marlon Brando in A Streetcar Named Desire (winning a Best Supporting Actor Oscar) & later turned in crucial performances in a pair of Best Picture winners, On the Waterfront (1954) and Patton (1970), before starring opposite a young Michael Douglas in TV's The Streets of San Francisco. Malden received the Screen Actors Guild Life Achievement Award in 2003.
Larry Gelbart (81): wrote several notable scripts; Oscar-nominated for Tootsie, co-creator/writer for TV's M*A*S*H
Lena Horne (92): Multiple Grammy winner, actress, and civil rights activist
Les Paul (94): one of the great guitar players and recording innovators; honored with permanent stand-alone exhibit in Cleveland's Rock and Roll Hall of Fame (thank you Wikipedia)
Maurice Jarre (84): among most prolific composers in cinema; score credits include Lawrence of Arabia, Doctor Zhivago, Ghost
JOKE BREAK #2 . . .
A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can.
Three years later, there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says "What the hell was that all about?"
Continued . . .
Maury Chaykin (61): one of the classic 'that guy's', My Cousin Vinny's ignorant witness; the volatile Harvey on Entourage
Natasha Richardson (45) & Lynn Redgrave (67): Two members of the famed Redgrave acting family, each excelled in television and film. Lynn was Vanessa Redgrave's sister, Natasha the latter's daughter and husband to Liam Neeson.
Patricia Neal (84): The Day the Earth Stood Still, Oscar winner (Best Actress) for Hud, playing opposite Paul Newman
Patrick McGoohan (80): TV's Danger Man & The Prisoner, played villainous Longshanks in best picture winner Braveheart
Peter Graves (83): star of TV's Mission: Impossible, clueless Captain Oveur in Airplane, responsible for one of the funniest exchanges movie history:
Captain Oveur: "You ever been in a cockpit before?"
Joey: "No sir, I've never been up in a plane before."
Captain Oveur: "You ever seen a grown man naked?"
Ricardo Montalban (88): Mr. Roarke on TV's Fantasy Island; Khan in Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, and Drebin's nemesis in the original Naked Gun. He received the Screen Actors Guild Life Achievement Award in 1993.
Ron Silver (62): looked like Al Pacino's brother, prolific career on tv and film
Roy Disney (79): Executive and lifelong member of the Walt Disney family; son of Roy, nephew of Walt; net worth over 1 billion
Steven Gilborn (72): Honestly can't tell you a single role, but his face was instantly recognizable; a staple of 80s/90s television, google the actor and you're sure to go "Ohhhh, him."
Soupy Sales (83): star of comedy sketch program in the 50s/60s, hit with more pies in the face than Milton Berle (unofficial stat)
Tom Bosley (83): Immortalized as 'Mr. C' on Happy Days, even if Mom says he was her least favorite member of the cast :(
Tony Curtis (85): Major movie star in the 50s/60s, fathered actress Jamie Lee Curtis with 1st wife Janet Leigh. Starring roles included Sweet Smell of Success, The Defiant Ones, & Billy Wilder's classic comedy Some Like it Hot opposite Jack Lemmon.
Walter Cronkite (92): CBS Evening News anchorman for two decades, Bruce Nolan's idol
Zelda Rubinstein (76): psychic in Poltergeist
Congratulations to anyone who reached the end of this post without coffee. Good-Bye, Pt. II will be posted in the next few days, highlighting some untimely sports exits and the big guns of 2010.
Thanks for reading, Happy New Year
Thursday, July 8, 2010
A Sad Day for Professional Basketball
When Lebron announced "I'm taking my talents" to South Beach at 9:30 tonight, my heart sank. This is the absolute worst thing that could've happened to both King James and the NBA. It speaks volumes about his competitive streak or lack thereof and at least for the time being, my opinion of him has dropped dramatically. But this disappointment has little to do with him leaving Cleveland, who he does not owe anything. He's been amazing for Northeast Ohio, influencing young kids in the community, generating millions of dollars for the local economy, and making millions of fans who'd previously had little reason to follow professional basketball. And yet I do feel bad for greater Cleveland. It's hard not to when a city has suffered this many sports related indignities. After the announcement, local news affiliates reported burning James jerseys, several minor riots, and even crying fans. I understand those who feel cheated, but to those saying he went on TV to stick it to Cleveland, grow up! He speaks genuinely whenever the Akron area is mentioned and hopes this is a community (don't use twice!) that will remain open to him. He's is not the devil. In all likelihood ESPN approached James about turning the announcement into an hour long special they knew would pull big ratings, not vice versa. I don't believe James is vindictive, but now for the first time in his career, I do view him as gutless.
About two hours before the announcement, I'd predicted that he was heading to the Knicks. I thought publicity mattered most and nowhere would he have received more than in the Big Apple, where professional basketball has become a joke in a city that arguably cares more about sports than any other. They'd just signed Amare Stoudemire, had a terrific coach in place, and Lebron would've been that much closer to global domination. Money and marketing opportunities would've come from all angles through endorsements and business deals. He'd have been in the news every day (not that he isn't now, but anyone who thinks Cleveland & New York are the same is naive). The Knicks wouldn't have been great, but they'd have been a fast improving team one move away from contending for a championship. Lebron could've saved basketball in New York and instantly become the best player to ever play for the Knicks, no questions asked. I really thought this would happen.
There was no way he could've chosen New Jersey or the Clippers for that matter, though winning a title with the latter would've been even more impressive than in New York. From a purely basketball standpoint, signing with the Chicago Bulls made the most sense. They have a stud point guard in Derek Rose and just stole power forward Carlos Boozer in free agency. Lebron's considerable skill set would've complemented those two perfectly. The Bulls had a solid supporting cast already in place and Lebron had spoken publicly about his fondness for Chicago. The only legitimate hindrance I could see was playing for the team that will forever belong to Michael Jordan. For years fans and those within the league have been showering praise upon Lebron as the one guy who really might become bigger and better than MJ. I understand not putting oneself under that microscope, but I can't fathom going completely in the opposite direction either. For days fans have been overcome with rumors and had little choice but to listen and sort them out. I'd received emails from friends regarding financial offices in Chicago that were tied to James. I heard the first "official" announcement that Lebron was to join the Knicks yesterday afternoon, but for all we know it could've come from the owner of "Ray's Pizza." And then we heard several sources mentioning Miami over and over again. But I didn't take this rumor seriously. It simply didn't make sense and still doesn't. After tonight's news I'm left wondering if Lebron wants no part of the microscope ever again.
Depending on who you ask, Miami's Dwayne Wade is either the second or third best basketball player alive (Kobe being the final member of this trio). There's no argument that the three of them reside in a different class from all other peers. But I don't ever remember players of this caliber, in any sport, orchestrating their own futures in this manner. It's all rather sickening. James, Wade, and Chris Bosh basically got together like scheming fathers in a youth hoops league to plot how to get their superstar kids on the same team. Bosh is the final pierce of the puzzle, but it's the teaming of James and Wade that irks me, especially from Lebron's perspective. The Heat are Wade's team. He's won a title there and has been the face of the franchise for years. James is too great to join a player of his caliber. I feel cheated as a basketball fan. Both players are use to dominating the ball for entire ball games at a time. They offer breathtaking plays on a nightly basis, many of which we've never seen before. Sure, they both have wonderful passing skills and will adapt their games accordingly, though nobody should want them to. These are the most gifted basketball players on the planet and we may never see either at his peak again. They will take turns dominating the opposition and while the rare game might showcase brilliance from both stars, it won't be often. Imagine Tom Brady and Peyton Manning joining forces and deciding, "we'll simply alternate quarters." Or better yet, Magic and Bird becoming teammates circa 1986. To make matters worse, Lebron and Wade practically play the same position! I'd raise all-in that Kobe would NEVER voluntarily join forces with Dwayne Wade as a free agent in his prime. He's too competitive and would relish the opportunity to beat him. This isn't the same as Shaq and Kobe combining to win back-to-back-to-back titles a decade ago. That pairing came to be when Kobe was an immature, unproven 13th pick out of high school and Shaq was on his way to becoming the league's alpha dog. They became an inside-outside powerhouse combo, but it wasn't of their making.
What is the best case scenario for Lebron now? Say he and Wade win three titles in the next five years (a stretch I think). Is that version of James even a top 10 all-timer at that point? Even if they won six championships together, giving Lebron one more than Kobe and tying Jordan, he'd still rank behind them. Whether he yet realizes it or not, James' decision has undermined his legacy forever. And he may no longer have the supreme stats to back the claims of his supporters. Is it possible to win another MVP when he'll be splitting votes with a teammate? I thought he cared about this stuff, but maybe I was wrong. Winning in Miami will mean less than anywhere else he could've gone. It may very well come easier, but it won't be nearly as impressive as winning in Cleveland or New York or almost any other team outside of Boston or L.A. Furthermore, going to the Bulls or Knicks would've kept the NBA at it's competitive peak, with strong contenders emerging from at least eight cities. Now we have one potential juggernaut in Miami and at least two dozen fewer games for fans to circle on their calendars this season. Quite frankly, this whole thing sucks. If David Stern is half as powerful as some have claimed, he should have vetoed this thing from the get-go.
If James wins in Miami, most knowledgeable fans will ask, "so what?" If he doesn't, it will be a disaster and being that the Heat have approximately $00.14 with which to fill out the remaining nine spots on their roster, a title is far from a sure thing. They will undoubtedly lead the league in SportsCenter top 10 highlights in 2010-11. I believe Vince Carter and Tracy McGrady once did as well in Toronto. But hey, at least he won't have to carry the load every night. What superstar would want that pressure?
This is much bigger than Cleveland. This is about the demeanor of a younger generation of basketball stars. It's about a lack of competitive drive amongst those who are given far too much too fast, who actually believe they've done a public service in settling for contracts that will pay them ONLY $100 million. But more than anything it's about Lebron, the "chosen one" and his decision to play it safe, just in case he can't quite live up to the hype.
About two hours before the announcement, I'd predicted that he was heading to the Knicks. I thought publicity mattered most and nowhere would he have received more than in the Big Apple, where professional basketball has become a joke in a city that arguably cares more about sports than any other. They'd just signed Amare Stoudemire, had a terrific coach in place, and Lebron would've been that much closer to global domination. Money and marketing opportunities would've come from all angles through endorsements and business deals. He'd have been in the news every day (not that he isn't now, but anyone who thinks Cleveland & New York are the same is naive). The Knicks wouldn't have been great, but they'd have been a fast improving team one move away from contending for a championship. Lebron could've saved basketball in New York and instantly become the best player to ever play for the Knicks, no questions asked. I really thought this would happen.
There was no way he could've chosen New Jersey or the Clippers for that matter, though winning a title with the latter would've been even more impressive than in New York. From a purely basketball standpoint, signing with the Chicago Bulls made the most sense. They have a stud point guard in Derek Rose and just stole power forward Carlos Boozer in free agency. Lebron's considerable skill set would've complemented those two perfectly. The Bulls had a solid supporting cast already in place and Lebron had spoken publicly about his fondness for Chicago. The only legitimate hindrance I could see was playing for the team that will forever belong to Michael Jordan. For years fans and those within the league have been showering praise upon Lebron as the one guy who really might become bigger and better than MJ. I understand not putting oneself under that microscope, but I can't fathom going completely in the opposite direction either. For days fans have been overcome with rumors and had little choice but to listen and sort them out. I'd received emails from friends regarding financial offices in Chicago that were tied to James. I heard the first "official" announcement that Lebron was to join the Knicks yesterday afternoon, but for all we know it could've come from the owner of "Ray's Pizza." And then we heard several sources mentioning Miami over and over again. But I didn't take this rumor seriously. It simply didn't make sense and still doesn't. After tonight's news I'm left wondering if Lebron wants no part of the microscope ever again.
Depending on who you ask, Miami's Dwayne Wade is either the second or third best basketball player alive (Kobe being the final member of this trio). There's no argument that the three of them reside in a different class from all other peers. But I don't ever remember players of this caliber, in any sport, orchestrating their own futures in this manner. It's all rather sickening. James, Wade, and Chris Bosh basically got together like scheming fathers in a youth hoops league to plot how to get their superstar kids on the same team. Bosh is the final pierce of the puzzle, but it's the teaming of James and Wade that irks me, especially from Lebron's perspective. The Heat are Wade's team. He's won a title there and has been the face of the franchise for years. James is too great to join a player of his caliber. I feel cheated as a basketball fan. Both players are use to dominating the ball for entire ball games at a time. They offer breathtaking plays on a nightly basis, many of which we've never seen before. Sure, they both have wonderful passing skills and will adapt their games accordingly, though nobody should want them to. These are the most gifted basketball players on the planet and we may never see either at his peak again. They will take turns dominating the opposition and while the rare game might showcase brilliance from both stars, it won't be often. Imagine Tom Brady and Peyton Manning joining forces and deciding, "we'll simply alternate quarters." Or better yet, Magic and Bird becoming teammates circa 1986. To make matters worse, Lebron and Wade practically play the same position! I'd raise all-in that Kobe would NEVER voluntarily join forces with Dwayne Wade as a free agent in his prime. He's too competitive and would relish the opportunity to beat him. This isn't the same as Shaq and Kobe combining to win back-to-back-to-back titles a decade ago. That pairing came to be when Kobe was an immature, unproven 13th pick out of high school and Shaq was on his way to becoming the league's alpha dog. They became an inside-outside powerhouse combo, but it wasn't of their making.
What is the best case scenario for Lebron now? Say he and Wade win three titles in the next five years (a stretch I think). Is that version of James even a top 10 all-timer at that point? Even if they won six championships together, giving Lebron one more than Kobe and tying Jordan, he'd still rank behind them. Whether he yet realizes it or not, James' decision has undermined his legacy forever. And he may no longer have the supreme stats to back the claims of his supporters. Is it possible to win another MVP when he'll be splitting votes with a teammate? I thought he cared about this stuff, but maybe I was wrong. Winning in Miami will mean less than anywhere else he could've gone. It may very well come easier, but it won't be nearly as impressive as winning in Cleveland or New York or almost any other team outside of Boston or L.A. Furthermore, going to the Bulls or Knicks would've kept the NBA at it's competitive peak, with strong contenders emerging from at least eight cities. Now we have one potential juggernaut in Miami and at least two dozen fewer games for fans to circle on their calendars this season. Quite frankly, this whole thing sucks. If David Stern is half as powerful as some have claimed, he should have vetoed this thing from the get-go.
If James wins in Miami, most knowledgeable fans will ask, "so what?" If he doesn't, it will be a disaster and being that the Heat have approximately $00.14 with which to fill out the remaining nine spots on their roster, a title is far from a sure thing. They will undoubtedly lead the league in SportsCenter top 10 highlights in 2010-11. I believe Vince Carter and Tracy McGrady once did as well in Toronto. But hey, at least he won't have to carry the load every night. What superstar would want that pressure?
This is much bigger than Cleveland. This is about the demeanor of a younger generation of basketball stars. It's about a lack of competitive drive amongst those who are given far too much too fast, who actually believe they've done a public service in settling for contracts that will pay them ONLY $100 million. But more than anything it's about Lebron, the "chosen one" and his decision to play it safe, just in case he can't quite live up to the hype.
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Round 2
I’m giddy with anticipation, as tonight opens what could be one of the best NBA finals of all-time (T-minus 23 hours until tip-off). Honestly, I can’t remember the last time the NBA finals featured two teams this evenly matched. It rarely happens and on those rare instances when it does, the teams involved usually bore me to tears (think ’05 Spurs vs. Pistons or ’94 Rockets vs. Knicks). But 2010 promises to be good at a minimum, great in probability, with potential for a real classic. When Boston faced L.A. in 2008, I came up with a list of 17 legitimate reasons (for #17 of course) why the Celtics would win and it honestly wasn’t all that difficult. The media backed the flashier Lakers as they usually do, even though anyone who knows basketball should’ve seen their demise coming. The ’08 Celtics were tougher, smarter, and hungrier than the ’08 Lakers, not to mention far better defensively. But the teams have changed since then. This Lakers squad is easily the best of their last three, all of which reached the finals (the ’09 team easily conquering a relatively weak Orlando team). The addition of Ron Artest has paid off (count me among the initially skeptical) and Pau Gasol is for my money one of the league’s most improved players. This Celtics team may or may not be as good as their 2008 title team, which sounds ludicrous (they limped unheralded into the playoffs) until you consider the fact that nobody has beaten these guys when completely healthy. And while a few of their key players have lost a step, the emergence of Rajon Rondo as the most destructive force throughout the playoffs will ultimately secure the legacy of this group in team history. While admittedly tough to write an unbiased prediction for the series, I have enough integrity to distance myself from an often blind passion for the C’s. So consider the following as fact, as well as what every prognosticator in the country SHOULD be thinking as I break this series down.
All season I’ve heard about how long the Lakers big men are, how skilled they are, and how they’ve caused huge match up problems for everyone they’ve faced. Well most of that is true, until now, because the Celtics are the only team in the NBA that matches their length. Sure Andrew Bynum is big and bulky, has some ability, and is not quite a poor man’s Dwight Howard, who if memory serves was relatively held in check by none other than Kendrick Perkins. Perkins isn’t on the level of Howard or Bynum or maybe even an aging Shaq, but he’s rock solid, knows how to use his body, and understands his limitations. He’s a terrific rebounder, blocks the occasional shot, and refuses to back down. I see no reason Perk doesn’t hold Bynum to 12pts and 7 boards a game in this series. As for Gasol, he is very, very good but in Kevin Garnett the C’s have the league’s only answer. He’s just as tall as the goofy Spaniard, lean and quick, with equally strong hands and footwork. KG remains the more physical of the two and although Gasol has hardened since ’08, not to mention logged far fewer minutes over the course of his career, a few patented shrieks of insanity from the Big Ticket brings this contest to a draw. Furthermore, the C’s possess an edge on the bench here. Rasheed Wallace will probably continue his Jekyll & Hyde act but could prove a major factor on both ends. He’s long enough to bother Gasol on defense and shoots well enough to pull him away from the paint on the other end. Glen Davis adds bulk and a surprising ability to finish around the basket. He’s the team’s most improved player this season. Luke Walton isn’t big enough to deal with either player. L.A.’s most reliable bench option is Lamar Odom, who will probably play every frontcourt position at one point or another but will see most of his minutes trying to help on KG and Paul Pierce. He could conceivably win a game for L.A. in the finals, but will be a complete no-show in at least one or two others. Odom is what he is, a versatile position player who can provide instant offense and rebound if the mood strikes, but can’t be counted on from night-to-night; he’s a bizarro world Rashard Lewis if you will.
The perimeter features the best offensive players in the series. Pierce had a strong series against Orlando, including a climactic game 6 with 31 points and 13 boards. He can’t fill the box-score every night anymore, but he probably doesn’t have to. But he does need to hold his ground against Artest, who’s given him fits in the past. However, those were mainly issues of maturity on both ends. The Detroit brawler won’t be pulling down the Truth’s pants in the finals and even if he did, Pierce has reached the stage in his career where he can laugh it off rather than bitch to the refs or hold a press conference wearing a head bandage that makes it look like he just fought Tyson. Artest has never been as good as player as Pierce, but he’s even more physical and is one of the few players in the league who can spark a team with his defense. He can shoot from the outside and uses his body well on crafty drives with either hand. Despite remaining as big a nut job as Sheed, I think Artest realizes how important he is to the Lakers in this series and will bring his “A” game. He’s familiar with Pierce on offense, but fortunately for the Celtics their captain is one of the few in the game who can score from any angle on the court. Odom will provide different looks when Artest rests. The key for Pierce will be staying out of foul trouble and avoiding confrontation. At worst small forward is a draw for Boston and at best it’s a significant strength.
The one spot on the floor L.A. holds a clear advantage is the 2-spot, with all-world talent Kobe Bryant gunning for his 5th ring. I’ve been more impressed with Kobe this playoff run than in many sensational previous ones. He just has a better feel for his team it seems. That said he’s going to be kept on his toes the whole series. Ray Allen is playing as well as he has since leaving Seattle and Kobe won’t be able to take any breaks on D. As good as he’s been playing, neither Kobe nor Phil Jackson wants a shoot-out against the artist formerly known as Jesus Shuttlesworth. Tony Allen has been a huge spark off the bench for Boston this postseason and will play an important role in holding Kobe at key times down the stretch. Two years ago one of the big reasons the Lakers lost was that they didn’t have the best player in the series (in practice, not on paper). Kobe knows Pierce outplayed him in 2008 and will be looking for revenge. Only this time his biggest obstacle may be playing a different position.
Rajon Rondo IS the deciding factor in this series assuming he’s healthy (I am knocking the shit out of T’s wooden computer desk at this moment). This isn’t even debatable. He’s is the Celtic’s fastest, most unstoppable, and indispensable player. He runs the offense and may now be the key to starting their defense, wreaking havoc in the open floor. There are maybe 2 or 3 point guards in the league who can go toe-to-toe with Rondo these days and Derek Fisher is not one of them. I’ve always respected Fisher and think he’s one of the best glue-guys of the last 15 years, but he’s out of his depth with Rondo, who could probably run a suicide in the time it takes Fisher to set up for a three. How about the bench options for L.A.? Shannon Brown? Jordan Farmer? Please. (However, I must admit I’d react the same way were Nate Robinson their backup, so nothing is 100%). L.A. may have no choice but to stick Kobe on Rondo for extended stretches, but if Cleveland decided against this strategy with Lebron James, I don’t see Phil getting too radical here. The questions about Rondo’s health do concern me and it would seem tragic if he were to falter just as the KG, Pierce, & Ray have regained their stride. But I think he’ll be fine. If he can bounce back from a mega-blow from D. Howard, he can do anything. L.A.’s one wild card (should Phil start sniffing glue) would be to throw Artest on Rondo, but that’s a last resort that would come only if they lose the 1st two at home. And then he’d be left looking for answers for Pierce.
Another favorable break for Boston is the fact that coaching generally doesn’t win an NBA championship series, though for what it’s worth I’ve grown comfortable to the point of having 70% confidence in Doc Rivers (that’s a huge step-up from a couple seasons ago). He also brings worlds more class to the proceedings than Captain psycho-babble. Phil Jackson’s approach has proven hugely successful for years, but in truth he’s not an X’s and O’s guy. In many ways his impact on this team is a thing of the past. He helped get them here, controlled the team egos, and now understands that his team’s opponent is a veteran club who will be ready for anything. The Lakers will not be pushing anybody around and will likely only go so far as Kobe takes them. Doc takes a much more hands-on approach, which admittedly goes both ways, although to his credit many of his play calls throughout the last several months have really impressed me, both in design and execution. I’m fine with the coaching battle.
So what are we left with? On-court match ups favor Boston by virtue of Rondo, unless Kobe scores 45 a game (which isn’t impossible). Their defense is still better, although L.A. has improved greatly in that regard. Both teams play exceptionally well on the road, so the Lakers home court advantage isn’t much of a factor. Boston has the more passionate fan-base. What’s more, Boston has faced a tougher road to the finals, which many seem to be forgetting. The 2010 Western Conference was a pale imitation of past seasons. There were undoubtedly a higher number of solid teams out west, but the Mavericks, Spurs, Jazz, & Suns all would’ve been underdogs to the Cavs, Magic, or a healthy Celtics squad. The Lakers had cruised until Phoenix started scoring a bit, while the C’s had to battle 3 of the league’s 5 best players on their trip to the finals.
What’s more, everyone outside of California seems to be pulling for Boston which I find amusing. I have customers coming up to me, presumed Cleveland fans no less, saying that while they are upset the Cavs are done, they hate the Lakers more and will definitely be rooting for Boston. Call me old fashioned, but I don’t think I could root for the team that destroyed my whole season and possibly my city’s entire basketball future. I enjoy being considered (foolish though it is) a slight underdog to these Lakers and would be significantly more petrified if we were the dominant favorites. These Celtics relish that opportunity, particularly the veterans and Pierce, who I’m convinced circles the calendar date of every opportunity he gets to play in Los Angeles, his hometown. Pierce has had an up-and-down postseason, but that’s to be expected chasing Lebron one series then abusing Vince Carter the next. History is as much on the line for these Celtics as it is for Kobe’s legacy. And while I rarely bet against Kobe in a big series, he hasn’t shown he can beat a great finals opponent yet even with Shaq (He has no control over his opponent, but still). This is arguably the most momentous test of his career and while he remains the best player in the finals, there are at least 8 players who could conceivably make or break this series. I’ll take the Big 4 in green.
CELTICS in 6!!!
A final capper: I almost always agree with Tim Legler, who knows his facts and seems like he could talk intelligent basketball for hours. He’s become the most underrated ex-player turned reliable analyst in the sport’s history. The most famous member of that group, the endlessly entertaining Charles Barkley, rarely predicts the correct outcome, though his natural charisma draws thousands to his cause. Listening to his radio interview with Dan Patrick Thursday morning brought a smile to my face.
Official 2010 Finals Predictions –
Legler: Celtics
Barkley: Lakers
I feel good (Though I’m pretending I never heard Reggie pick Boston on PTI last week. Jeez, I don’t even like writing that. Scratch it from your memory. He must play no part in this contest. Let’s enjoy the finals)!
All season I’ve heard about how long the Lakers big men are, how skilled they are, and how they’ve caused huge match up problems for everyone they’ve faced. Well most of that is true, until now, because the Celtics are the only team in the NBA that matches their length. Sure Andrew Bynum is big and bulky, has some ability, and is not quite a poor man’s Dwight Howard, who if memory serves was relatively held in check by none other than Kendrick Perkins. Perkins isn’t on the level of Howard or Bynum or maybe even an aging Shaq, but he’s rock solid, knows how to use his body, and understands his limitations. He’s a terrific rebounder, blocks the occasional shot, and refuses to back down. I see no reason Perk doesn’t hold Bynum to 12pts and 7 boards a game in this series. As for Gasol, he is very, very good but in Kevin Garnett the C’s have the league’s only answer. He’s just as tall as the goofy Spaniard, lean and quick, with equally strong hands and footwork. KG remains the more physical of the two and although Gasol has hardened since ’08, not to mention logged far fewer minutes over the course of his career, a few patented shrieks of insanity from the Big Ticket brings this contest to a draw. Furthermore, the C’s possess an edge on the bench here. Rasheed Wallace will probably continue his Jekyll & Hyde act but could prove a major factor on both ends. He’s long enough to bother Gasol on defense and shoots well enough to pull him away from the paint on the other end. Glen Davis adds bulk and a surprising ability to finish around the basket. He’s the team’s most improved player this season. Luke Walton isn’t big enough to deal with either player. L.A.’s most reliable bench option is Lamar Odom, who will probably play every frontcourt position at one point or another but will see most of his minutes trying to help on KG and Paul Pierce. He could conceivably win a game for L.A. in the finals, but will be a complete no-show in at least one or two others. Odom is what he is, a versatile position player who can provide instant offense and rebound if the mood strikes, but can’t be counted on from night-to-night; he’s a bizarro world Rashard Lewis if you will.
The perimeter features the best offensive players in the series. Pierce had a strong series against Orlando, including a climactic game 6 with 31 points and 13 boards. He can’t fill the box-score every night anymore, but he probably doesn’t have to. But he does need to hold his ground against Artest, who’s given him fits in the past. However, those were mainly issues of maturity on both ends. The Detroit brawler won’t be pulling down the Truth’s pants in the finals and even if he did, Pierce has reached the stage in his career where he can laugh it off rather than bitch to the refs or hold a press conference wearing a head bandage that makes it look like he just fought Tyson. Artest has never been as good as player as Pierce, but he’s even more physical and is one of the few players in the league who can spark a team with his defense. He can shoot from the outside and uses his body well on crafty drives with either hand. Despite remaining as big a nut job as Sheed, I think Artest realizes how important he is to the Lakers in this series and will bring his “A” game. He’s familiar with Pierce on offense, but fortunately for the Celtics their captain is one of the few in the game who can score from any angle on the court. Odom will provide different looks when Artest rests. The key for Pierce will be staying out of foul trouble and avoiding confrontation. At worst small forward is a draw for Boston and at best it’s a significant strength.
The one spot on the floor L.A. holds a clear advantage is the 2-spot, with all-world talent Kobe Bryant gunning for his 5th ring. I’ve been more impressed with Kobe this playoff run than in many sensational previous ones. He just has a better feel for his team it seems. That said he’s going to be kept on his toes the whole series. Ray Allen is playing as well as he has since leaving Seattle and Kobe won’t be able to take any breaks on D. As good as he’s been playing, neither Kobe nor Phil Jackson wants a shoot-out against the artist formerly known as Jesus Shuttlesworth. Tony Allen has been a huge spark off the bench for Boston this postseason and will play an important role in holding Kobe at key times down the stretch. Two years ago one of the big reasons the Lakers lost was that they didn’t have the best player in the series (in practice, not on paper). Kobe knows Pierce outplayed him in 2008 and will be looking for revenge. Only this time his biggest obstacle may be playing a different position.
Rajon Rondo IS the deciding factor in this series assuming he’s healthy (I am knocking the shit out of T’s wooden computer desk at this moment). This isn’t even debatable. He’s is the Celtic’s fastest, most unstoppable, and indispensable player. He runs the offense and may now be the key to starting their defense, wreaking havoc in the open floor. There are maybe 2 or 3 point guards in the league who can go toe-to-toe with Rondo these days and Derek Fisher is not one of them. I’ve always respected Fisher and think he’s one of the best glue-guys of the last 15 years, but he’s out of his depth with Rondo, who could probably run a suicide in the time it takes Fisher to set up for a three. How about the bench options for L.A.? Shannon Brown? Jordan Farmer? Please. (However, I must admit I’d react the same way were Nate Robinson their backup, so nothing is 100%). L.A. may have no choice but to stick Kobe on Rondo for extended stretches, but if Cleveland decided against this strategy with Lebron James, I don’t see Phil getting too radical here. The questions about Rondo’s health do concern me and it would seem tragic if he were to falter just as the KG, Pierce, & Ray have regained their stride. But I think he’ll be fine. If he can bounce back from a mega-blow from D. Howard, he can do anything. L.A.’s one wild card (should Phil start sniffing glue) would be to throw Artest on Rondo, but that’s a last resort that would come only if they lose the 1st two at home. And then he’d be left looking for answers for Pierce.
Another favorable break for Boston is the fact that coaching generally doesn’t win an NBA championship series, though for what it’s worth I’ve grown comfortable to the point of having 70% confidence in Doc Rivers (that’s a huge step-up from a couple seasons ago). He also brings worlds more class to the proceedings than Captain psycho-babble. Phil Jackson’s approach has proven hugely successful for years, but in truth he’s not an X’s and O’s guy. In many ways his impact on this team is a thing of the past. He helped get them here, controlled the team egos, and now understands that his team’s opponent is a veteran club who will be ready for anything. The Lakers will not be pushing anybody around and will likely only go so far as Kobe takes them. Doc takes a much more hands-on approach, which admittedly goes both ways, although to his credit many of his play calls throughout the last several months have really impressed me, both in design and execution. I’m fine with the coaching battle.
So what are we left with? On-court match ups favor Boston by virtue of Rondo, unless Kobe scores 45 a game (which isn’t impossible). Their defense is still better, although L.A. has improved greatly in that regard. Both teams play exceptionally well on the road, so the Lakers home court advantage isn’t much of a factor. Boston has the more passionate fan-base. What’s more, Boston has faced a tougher road to the finals, which many seem to be forgetting. The 2010 Western Conference was a pale imitation of past seasons. There were undoubtedly a higher number of solid teams out west, but the Mavericks, Spurs, Jazz, & Suns all would’ve been underdogs to the Cavs, Magic, or a healthy Celtics squad. The Lakers had cruised until Phoenix started scoring a bit, while the C’s had to battle 3 of the league’s 5 best players on their trip to the finals.
What’s more, everyone outside of California seems to be pulling for Boston which I find amusing. I have customers coming up to me, presumed Cleveland fans no less, saying that while they are upset the Cavs are done, they hate the Lakers more and will definitely be rooting for Boston. Call me old fashioned, but I don’t think I could root for the team that destroyed my whole season and possibly my city’s entire basketball future. I enjoy being considered (foolish though it is) a slight underdog to these Lakers and would be significantly more petrified if we were the dominant favorites. These Celtics relish that opportunity, particularly the veterans and Pierce, who I’m convinced circles the calendar date of every opportunity he gets to play in Los Angeles, his hometown. Pierce has had an up-and-down postseason, but that’s to be expected chasing Lebron one series then abusing Vince Carter the next. History is as much on the line for these Celtics as it is for Kobe’s legacy. And while I rarely bet against Kobe in a big series, he hasn’t shown he can beat a great finals opponent yet even with Shaq (He has no control over his opponent, but still). This is arguably the most momentous test of his career and while he remains the best player in the finals, there are at least 8 players who could conceivably make or break this series. I’ll take the Big 4 in green.
CELTICS in 6!!!
A final capper: I almost always agree with Tim Legler, who knows his facts and seems like he could talk intelligent basketball for hours. He’s become the most underrated ex-player turned reliable analyst in the sport’s history. The most famous member of that group, the endlessly entertaining Charles Barkley, rarely predicts the correct outcome, though his natural charisma draws thousands to his cause. Listening to his radio interview with Dan Patrick Thursday morning brought a smile to my face.
Official 2010 Finals Predictions –
Legler: Celtics
Barkley: Lakers
I feel good (Though I’m pretending I never heard Reggie pick Boston on PTI last week. Jeez, I don’t even like writing that. Scratch it from your memory. He must play no part in this contest. Let’s enjoy the finals)!
Sunday, May 9, 2010
The Emergence of Rondo and a Looming NBA Upset
Rajon Rondo just submitted one of the greatest playoff games by any Celtic in my lifetime. But before gushing over how awesome he has become (my green screensaver now lists the 3 definitions of what it means to be "Rondo'd") , I’d like to confirm that I was 8 for 8 picking the 1st round of the NBA playoffs. Unfortunately, because I failed to post these predictions prior to tip-off in round 1, you’ll have to take my word for it. There were only two surprises; Atlanta’s difficulty in eliminating Milwaukee minus Andrew Bogut and Bill Simmons’ incomprehensible pick of Miami in 7 games, the most telling example yet of his pitiful transition to lazy Los Angeles fan. I would’ve bet my apartment on the C’s in round 1. Other high and lowlights: Kevin Durant continued to emerge as a force, Dirk Nowitzki cemented his status as the best player incapable of winning a big game, and Brandon Roy is unfortunately turning into Grant Hill before our eyes. Above all, the Cleveland Cavaliers have become the 2001 Lakers, though not with their play but the public perception surrounding them.
They benefit from phantom fouls to such a degree that the David Stern conspiracy theories seem truly justified. They also have the most arrogant fan base ever for a team that frankly hasn’t won anything. They cruised through the league with ease on their way to the NBA’s top record, but that only goes so far. Hell the 1996 Sonics won 64 games. The media has treated this Cavalier squad with a reverence typically accorded to champions. With the best player in the world leading them this isn't a complete shock, undeserved as it is. But I’ll use this forum to repeat myself for the umpteenth time in 2010 . . . this is NOT a great team, but a good one, made very good with the late season acquisition of Antawn Jamison. They have strong shooting and size, but no real point guard. They have the scariest offensive player in the world, but a suspect coach. They defend with intelligence, but lack the requisite intensity to dominate an entire playoff. I think Lebron knows he’s leaving. I have no proof of course, merely a strong hunch. To everyone who claims he (and Dwayne Wade for that matter) is staying put, I ask the obvious: Why would he stay? James hails from Akron, and perhaps he fears the hometown perception should he bolt to the New York area. But I think he possesses a selfish drive that he hides better than say, Kobe Bryant. He wants to be King of the sport’s world and it’s time to move to the world's biggest city. They have the money to surround James with anyone and anything he wants. Cleveland has made a strong effort, but if I’m James I’m leaving. Shaq is not the answer, neither is Mo Williams. A fresh start ensures at least 3 rings, whereas I could see him wasting his prime years for the Cavs. So I’ll go on record, something I should’ve done months ago: If he wins a title in 2010, he will stay. If not, he’s gone. Wade’s choice is much, much easier unless he can’t live without the beach and pulled pork sandwiches. He can challenge Lebron for the next decade with a timely relocation to Chicago. Otherwise he will go down as the best player ever to win but a single title. I offer no exaggeration: Wade IS that good, though few non-basketball lifers would know it.
The 2nd round has been more surprising than the 1st for a few reasons. The Suns have dominated the Spurs for the first time in Steve Nash’s tenure, with a more polished half-court offense and a higher commitment to defense than his previous highlight reel teams. This series also marks the end of the Spurs, whom I’ve never discounted until now. It's officially time for San Antonio to rebuild (think the Celtics circa 1990). Whether they will is another question. The Lakers have also cruised to a 3-0 lead in round 2, leaving a very good Utah team on the verge of summer vacation. It’s tough to fault the Jazz, who have the league’s best point guard-big man tandem in Deron Williams and Carlos Boozer. They’ve never matched up well with the Kobe-led Lakers, but they are one smart trade away from dominating the western conference for the next 5 years (unless Durant goes bonkers).
In the east no team has disappointed more than the Hawks, who would’ve fared better against either Cleveland or Boston. But a hungry Orlando group is crushing them. When Joe Johnson leaves this summer, it will mark a quick end to the Atlanta resurgence. Al Horford deserves better. But Orlando looks awesome and will benefit more than anyone from the likely 7-game series emerging between their competitors. The Magic are playing with purpose and a chip on their shoulder, knowing that television executives everywhere are hoping they fold before the NBA finals. The league’s dream match up would be L.A./Cleveland, allowing a fight between the world’s two best players for the 1st time since 1987, the last time Bird and Magic faced off. The runner-up scenario would be Boston upsetting Cleveland for a rematch from 2008 between the NBA’s top franchises. An Orlando/Phoenix match up would provide some entertainment and a rare opportunity for Nash & Vince Carter to get over the hump, more important for the latter. Plus Dwight Howard vs. Amare Stoudemire is intriguing. But ultimately nobody wants this match up. And if I’m Nash I’m praying Boston doesn’t advance because they have the only point guard left capable of destroying him, which brings us back to Rondo.
The newly anointed best player for the Celtics, Rondo just put together a spectacular Game 4, posting 29 points, 18 rebounds, & 13 assists, one of them a fast break behind-the-back feed to Tony Allen that fooled Lebron right out of the gym. He is the fastest open-court guard since young Jason Kidd and a constantly improving shooter as well. He drew the defense all day long, creating easy buckets for Kevin Garnett, Ray Allen (strong performance), Glen Davis, and especially Tony Allen, who for my money played his best game in a Boston uniform thus far, making timely baskets and smothering James as well as anyone has in months. But this was Rondo’s show and he was so good that he single-handedly offset a virtual no-show by Paul Pierce, who fought foul trouble and only emerged down the stretch of the 4th quarter. But I’m feeling great right now. The Celtics could easily be up 3-1 had they not blown Game 1. Furthermore they are silencing not only their critics, but the shortsighted local and national media who jumped all over the Cleveland bandwagon. I wanted Cleveland in the East semis rather than the conference finals, knowing we'd have more energy at this stage. I predicted a 7-game series when most of the country saw 5. And it wasn’t a merely a case of favoritism for my hometown boys. The bottom line: For the Cavs to win Lebron is going to need to be the best player on the floor every night. The Celtics merely need one of the big 3 to give Rondo a break every now-and-again. And something tells me Pierce is due to drop 35. He’s too proud and too talented not to make his presence felt in this series.
Beef’s crystal ball the rest of the way: A pair of hard-fought road wins (it's that competitive!) in games 5 & 6, with Boston coming through to take game 7 in Cleveland. And if I’m wrong, at least I didn’t abandon ship like the Sport's Guy.
They benefit from phantom fouls to such a degree that the David Stern conspiracy theories seem truly justified. They also have the most arrogant fan base ever for a team that frankly hasn’t won anything. They cruised through the league with ease on their way to the NBA’s top record, but that only goes so far. Hell the 1996 Sonics won 64 games. The media has treated this Cavalier squad with a reverence typically accorded to champions. With the best player in the world leading them this isn't a complete shock, undeserved as it is. But I’ll use this forum to repeat myself for the umpteenth time in 2010 . . . this is NOT a great team, but a good one, made very good with the late season acquisition of Antawn Jamison. They have strong shooting and size, but no real point guard. They have the scariest offensive player in the world, but a suspect coach. They defend with intelligence, but lack the requisite intensity to dominate an entire playoff. I think Lebron knows he’s leaving. I have no proof of course, merely a strong hunch. To everyone who claims he (and Dwayne Wade for that matter) is staying put, I ask the obvious: Why would he stay? James hails from Akron, and perhaps he fears the hometown perception should he bolt to the New York area. But I think he possesses a selfish drive that he hides better than say, Kobe Bryant. He wants to be King of the sport’s world and it’s time to move to the world's biggest city. They have the money to surround James with anyone and anything he wants. Cleveland has made a strong effort, but if I’m James I’m leaving. Shaq is not the answer, neither is Mo Williams. A fresh start ensures at least 3 rings, whereas I could see him wasting his prime years for the Cavs. So I’ll go on record, something I should’ve done months ago: If he wins a title in 2010, he will stay. If not, he’s gone. Wade’s choice is much, much easier unless he can’t live without the beach and pulled pork sandwiches. He can challenge Lebron for the next decade with a timely relocation to Chicago. Otherwise he will go down as the best player ever to win but a single title. I offer no exaggeration: Wade IS that good, though few non-basketball lifers would know it.
The 2nd round has been more surprising than the 1st for a few reasons. The Suns have dominated the Spurs for the first time in Steve Nash’s tenure, with a more polished half-court offense and a higher commitment to defense than his previous highlight reel teams. This series also marks the end of the Spurs, whom I’ve never discounted until now. It's officially time for San Antonio to rebuild (think the Celtics circa 1990). Whether they will is another question. The Lakers have also cruised to a 3-0 lead in round 2, leaving a very good Utah team on the verge of summer vacation. It’s tough to fault the Jazz, who have the league’s best point guard-big man tandem in Deron Williams and Carlos Boozer. They’ve never matched up well with the Kobe-led Lakers, but they are one smart trade away from dominating the western conference for the next 5 years (unless Durant goes bonkers).
In the east no team has disappointed more than the Hawks, who would’ve fared better against either Cleveland or Boston. But a hungry Orlando group is crushing them. When Joe Johnson leaves this summer, it will mark a quick end to the Atlanta resurgence. Al Horford deserves better. But Orlando looks awesome and will benefit more than anyone from the likely 7-game series emerging between their competitors. The Magic are playing with purpose and a chip on their shoulder, knowing that television executives everywhere are hoping they fold before the NBA finals. The league’s dream match up would be L.A./Cleveland, allowing a fight between the world’s two best players for the 1st time since 1987, the last time Bird and Magic faced off. The runner-up scenario would be Boston upsetting Cleveland for a rematch from 2008 between the NBA’s top franchises. An Orlando/Phoenix match up would provide some entertainment and a rare opportunity for Nash & Vince Carter to get over the hump, more important for the latter. Plus Dwight Howard vs. Amare Stoudemire is intriguing. But ultimately nobody wants this match up. And if I’m Nash I’m praying Boston doesn’t advance because they have the only point guard left capable of destroying him, which brings us back to Rondo.
The newly anointed best player for the Celtics, Rondo just put together a spectacular Game 4, posting 29 points, 18 rebounds, & 13 assists, one of them a fast break behind-the-back feed to Tony Allen that fooled Lebron right out of the gym. He is the fastest open-court guard since young Jason Kidd and a constantly improving shooter as well. He drew the defense all day long, creating easy buckets for Kevin Garnett, Ray Allen (strong performance), Glen Davis, and especially Tony Allen, who for my money played his best game in a Boston uniform thus far, making timely baskets and smothering James as well as anyone has in months. But this was Rondo’s show and he was so good that he single-handedly offset a virtual no-show by Paul Pierce, who fought foul trouble and only emerged down the stretch of the 4th quarter. But I’m feeling great right now. The Celtics could easily be up 3-1 had they not blown Game 1. Furthermore they are silencing not only their critics, but the shortsighted local and national media who jumped all over the Cleveland bandwagon. I wanted Cleveland in the East semis rather than the conference finals, knowing we'd have more energy at this stage. I predicted a 7-game series when most of the country saw 5. And it wasn’t a merely a case of favoritism for my hometown boys. The bottom line: For the Cavs to win Lebron is going to need to be the best player on the floor every night. The Celtics merely need one of the big 3 to give Rondo a break every now-and-again. And something tells me Pierce is due to drop 35. He’s too proud and too talented not to make his presence felt in this series.
Beef’s crystal ball the rest of the way: A pair of hard-fought road wins (it's that competitive!) in games 5 & 6, with Boston coming through to take game 7 in Cleveland. And if I’m wrong, at least I didn’t abandon ship like the Sport's Guy.
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